Sparkle of Darkness
by aDerangedBrony
Summary: After the ponies suffer on a pointless adventure, they experiment with different ways of overcoming their trauma.
1. Prologue: Sparkle of Darkness

**Prologue**

* * *

><p>Paying no attention to the awkward stares her blood-matted coat was attracting, Twilight Sparkle slowly made her way home. The ponies gawking at her had no idea what she'd just put her friends through, and even if she had the energy she wouldn't have given them a reaction. Upon her arrival she cast her gaze around the room; she was finally home, in her safe little haven of knowledge. Placing a sleeping Spike in his bed, she made her way upstairs to try and wash away the grime that caked her body and organise her thoughts. As she entered the bathroom her gaze strayed to the mirror. For a moment, she was lost, as if in a trance, staring at her reflection. It disgusted her. "Look at you," she croaked, "You're PATHETIC." She let out a piercing scream and smashed the mirror with her hoof. Her rage almost immediately transformed into sorrow, and tears ran down her cheek as she lowered herself into the bath. She wished she could stay there forever. She wouldn't have to face any of the physical challenges of the real world. Let alone the emotional ones. She could just sit there in her own little world, totally innocent and clean. But she knew that wasn't an option. She needed to share her thoughts with somepony, and her teacher always seemed to understand her better than anypony else.<p>

When Twilight finally made her way downstairs, Spike was still asleep. No matter, she preferred to write this letter herself anyway. She magically summoned a quill, ink bottle and parchment and prepared to pour her heart out.

"Dear Princess Celestia," she wrote, "Today I've learned little and accomplished nothing. Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie and I were out in Ponyville together this morning. We were on our way to Sugarcube Corner when Spike ran up to us, ranting incoherently. All I really caught was "Rarity", "taken", "woods" and "Save her", so naturally we followed his instructions and headed to the woods to save Rarity."

"As we galloped through the woods, Spike settled down and explained the situation. He had been helping Rarity find gems for a big project. A group of diamond dogs ambushed them from the trees and abducted rarity, practically ignoring Spike. His efforts to stop them were useless. He's only a baby dragon, after all. The dogs took Rarity with ease. This news worried me immensely; I've read about how the dogs treat captive ponies. Some of the things they do are unspeakable. Of course, I didn't tell the others this as I didn't want to worry them. Best we just get Rarity out of there as quickly as possible without too much hassle. I underestimated how the situation would escalate beyond the harmless romps we usually have."

"After some time, Spike told us that we were near the area Rarity had been taken. I knew that diamond dogs lived underground in complex networks of tunnels with multiple entrances, so we fanned out and searched for holes that we could fit through. Three such holes were in close proximity. This worked out well, because Spike would be little use against giant diamond dogs, and Pegusi are known to suffer from claustrophobia. I felt uneasy splitting up our group; in the past our strength had come from our friendship and combined efforts. I didn't know how we'd handle being separated like that. But I had little choice. The holes were barely big enough for a single pony to squeeze through, and my priority was to get in and out as quickly as possible. My plan was for Applejack, Pinkie and I to each take a hole, and for Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash to remain up top with Spike, who would expand one of the openings to make our return easier. Naturally, Rainbow Dash objected to being left behind, but she eventually conceded that it was the only reasonable option. I wish I had listened to her; I quickly grew to lament my decision"

"I wish I could forget those tunnels, but I never will. Apparently I'm as claustrophobic as a Pegasus. Within the first minute of forcing myself through that dark, cramped channel I was hyperventilating. Absolutely convinced that I was about to be crushed in a massive cave-in, I felt all the strength leave my body as I became drenched in cold sweat. After what felt like an eternity, I reached a breaking point. I tried inching backwards, but I couldn't manage it. I tried turning around, but there wasn't enough room. A feeling that I was crawling down into a suffocating grave completely overcame me, and I stopped moving as tears streamed down my face. I had given up on everything, and I just lay there, breathing in the overwhelmingly stale air of the tunnel, blubbering pathetically."

"I must have been sobbing louder than I thought, as it was loud enough to catch Applejack's attention. From the bottom of the tunnel I heard her call out "Is that you, Twi?" I had never been happier to hear her voice. It reminded me that I wasn't in this alone, that I had friends who had my back. It gave me new strength, and I managed to force myself further down the tunnel as I croaked "Yea, Applejack, I'm coming." The tunnel seemed far less suffocating with a friend waiting on the other end. It may have been my mind playing tricks on me, but the tunnel seemed to grow larger as I got closer to Applejack's reassuring voice. "C'mon now, sugar cube. You can make it." Her voice was comforting and encouraging, and without her I probably would've stayed in that tunnel until I died of dehydration. As I came to the end of the tunnel, I saw that it joined a larger tunnel that a few ponies could comfortably stand in. Seeing Applejack's silhouette (minus her hat, which she had abandoned before coming down the tunnel) I scrambled the last few metres in a great frenzy. She hauled me out into the larger passage, falling back as she did so, and I landed on top of her. "Ya'all right, sugar cube?" she asked with a reassuring smile,

"I'm fine now. Thank you, Applejack," I replied, with what must have been the weakest smile imaginable.

"All right," she said, sliding out from under me, "Let's go find our girls."

I picked myself up and we proceeded down the shaft."

"I was already regretting splitting up our group. Though Applejack put on a brave face, I could tell that she was very distressed too. Pinkie had suffered depression and hallucinations from being ignored by her friends for one day, so even a few hours in these caves would be incredibly distressing for her. On the other hand, she had been the one who sang "giggle at the ghostly" on the night we defeated Nightmare Moon. What were we to expect? Pinkie could have jumped to either extreme."

"As we continued, we happened across a most disturbing discovery; blood was smeared along the walls and floor. This trail started immediately below a hole in the roof and appeared to proceed further down the tunnel. Applejack and I stopped in our tracks and stared aghast at the sight. I looked at my comrade and held my hoof to my mouth, and she nodded, understanding my desire for silence. We slowly moved on, stealthily as possible, trying to perceive as far as possible down the dark passage."

"Our stealth was pointless. The wretched dogs probably detected our presence before we even found the bloody mess. Four of the brutes ambushed us from shallow cutaways in the cave walls, two on each side. Applejack kicked back at the pair on her side, knocking them back into the wall. I attempted to do the same, but I didn't have the strength of the earth pony, and my blows were easily resisted by the dogs. As Applejack faced the dogs on my side to save me again, one of the dogs on her side recovered from his daze, and collected themself for another attack. Before I could say a thing, the dog was lunging at her, and I launched myself at him to try and wrestle him away. I'd never used my magic to harm anypony before, and I knew no spells to hurt the dogs. As the dog and I moved towards each other, I put my head down and braced for the impact. I honestly didn't mean to kill him; I just underestimated my own horn's strength and sharpness. Immediately after I realised what I had done I pulled back. I felt the poor beast go momentarily tense, then completely limp. My horn had pierced his neck, and he seemed to be losing gallons of blood. Seeing the lengths we were apparently prepared to go to, the two conscious dogs retreated into the darkness."

"The beast stayed alive for what felt like hours, looking directly into my eyes. He seemed to be pleading; begging me to save him or put him out of his misery. I did neither. I just stared back at him, shocked at what had just happened. There was a clear moment when the life left his body. He shuddered and his eyes seemed to glaze over. Shortly afterwards, I broke eye contact and gazed up at Applejack, who was looking down on me concernedly. I tried to explain that I didn't mean to actually kill the poor dog, but she held up her hoof to interrupt me and said "S'all right, sugar cube. You did what you had to do." I wanted to tell her that I didn't mean that much harm, and convince her, as much as myself, that it wasn't my fault. But I was too tired, physically and emotionally. Besides, it really was my fault. I was just deluding myself to try and retain a sense of innocence at the time. I got up and said, "Let's just keep moving," with my back to Applejack. We proceeded, leaving the unconscious dog with his dead kinsman.

"We continued in eerie silence down the tunnel. Again it seemed to be becoming more and more narrow and stifling, and again I felt like I was slowly creeping to my grave. Eventually the silence was interrupted by the creepiest noise I've ever heard. It sounded like a wailing ghost tortured by unimaginable pain. This high pitched moaning was punctuated by hoarse croaks, coughs and sobs. Proceeding with caution, we eventually managed to distinguish the noises. "Giggle at the ghostly, guffaw at the grossly, crack up at the creepy- oh god, it won't stop, make it stop- giggle at the ghostly, giggle at the ghostly..." A chill ran down my spine and I started to gallop ahead. I should've known Pinkie couldn't handle this. I should've known none of us could handle this."

"The pink pony was a truly pitiful sight. She was cowering against the cave wall with her eyes tightly shut, blubbering, trying to force herself to laugh the pain away. Once wild and frizzy, her mane and tale were now straight and matted with grime. Her entire body seemed broken and she had dark purple bruises around her face, neck, legs and flank. Though she was covered in scratches and grazes, the deepest and most painful looking cut ran from her left temple to her right cheek, and appeared to have barely missed gouging out her eyes. She was drenched in blood, sweat, vomit, and other filth. The stench was repulsive. She was a total wreck. Of course I felt tremendously sorry for her, but I'm ashamed to admit that my strongest feeling was disgust."

"After staring at the tortured pony for the better part of a minute, I heard Applejack coming up beside me. We were both too shocked to make any move to try and reassure or comfort her. I wanted to, I really did. I just couldn't bring myself to approach her. She seemed unnatural. It was like she was radiating a repulsive, evil force. The wrecked pony eventually seemed to feel us gawking at her. She looked at us, with her eyes still tightly closed. She whimpered before forcing her dark, bloodshot eyes open. Returning our shocked gaze, she tried to wipe her face clean, before forcing the weakest, fakest smile I've ever seen. "Hi girls," she said quietly.

"What the hell did they do, Pinkie?" I shouldn't have asked. It was a reflex, not a conscious decision. The smile disappeared from her face, replaced by a look of absolute contempt. She looked directly into my eyes and paused for a moment, breathing deeply. A second later she looked away indignantly and said "Let's just go." To my surprise, she managed to stand, albeit wobbly, and we continued down the tunnel."

"Darker and darker, tighter and tighter, a feeling of absolute oppression. I had failed. I never should've split our group up. When we were broken apart, we were each individually broken and tortured in our own way. If we rescued Rarity, I thought that it would make everything better. We would have triumphed, and I would have my redemption. Of course, I was denied even this one ounce of satisfaction."

"Proceeding forward, we eventually heard muffled diamond dog voices from around a bend. They were coming our way, and it seemed we had no choice but to fight. Pinkie smiled wickedly and muttered "I'll make them pay" before charging ahead with renewed strength. Applejack and I came up after her. Her bloodlust was obvious. She tackled one of the dogs, biting and stomping on him viciously. His partner merely fell to his knees and screamed "please, stop!" but Pinkie wouldn't let up. Applejack and I stood there helplessly while Pinkie mauled the now limp dog. About half minute later, a few more diamond dogs walked through, hauling massive carts of gems. Following these dogs was the glamour pony herself, Rarity. She was totally unscathed and radiant as ever. The dogs howled while we ponies merely stood and stared on as Pinkie brutally murdered her target. After what felt like an eternity, she started panting and eased back on the beating, exhausted. Blood dripping from her mouth and hooves, she stared wildly around at us. "Well what are you waiting for?" she demanded, "Get them! Slaughter all the savages!" When the dog closest to me, who appeared to be the leader, was satisfied that we would not comply with the pink pony he pleaded, "Just take her. We thought her whining was bad enough. I never thought any of you would- would _kill_ over this. We just wanted gems. That's all we wanted. I didn't mean to start- this. Please, just take her and leave us alone; to bury our dead." This statement enraged Pinkie.

"You didn't start this? _You didn't start this?_" she giggled hysterically for a moment before altering her tone and becoming incredibly dark and terrifying, "Look at me. Know what you dogs did to me? And you dare try and make us out to be in the wrong? None of you deserve to live. You're all disgusting, savage beasts. You all need to die. You need to know suffering. You need to know pain." She was truly terrifying. I fear the Pink Pony has gone insane. She had clearly lost her element; I don't think she'll ever laugh again. I wanted to tell her that we can't descend to their level. I wanted to apologise to her. I wanted to make it all better. But all I could manage was to feebly say "Pinkie, let's just go." I'd had enough. I just wanted to get out of those tunnels. I felt more suffocated, more depressed than ever. Pinkie glanced from me to the bloody mess she had created. She seemed taken aback by her own act. She whimpered, and slowly started walking back the way we came, back to where Spike, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy would be waiting for us. Back home. We each fell in line behind her, ignoring the gems Rarity had collected which seemed so trivial and useless now. Without saying a word we made our way back through the labyrinth."

"Spike had done a good job expanding the tunnel. It was now much wider, and easy enough to climb to the surface. But even in the fresh air I felt I was suffocating, slowly creeping to a dark, smothering grave. I had caused lot of pain and suffering for no gain, and my failure was a heavy burden, which seemed to be physically weakening me. Moreover, I had no opportunity to seek redemption for my offense. This weight and depression was increased tenfold when we emerged from the ground to find Rainbow Dash and Spike kneeling over Fluttershy."

"I froze in shock and horror. Rainbow Dash heard us coming, and explained in a croaky voice "He came from the trees. I didn't see him 'till it was too late. There was nothing I could do." We all stood in silence for a moment. The world seemed to be crashing down upon me. Rainbow interrupted this silence again, saying "I hope you made 'em pay for this. Those dogs don't deserve to live." I had done everything wrong and caused so much damage. I was feeling light headed and physically sick. "She deserved better than this. She never harmed anypony. All she ever wanted to do was care and love," continued the Pegasus. I gazed around, trying to find something to distract me from my breakdown. A short distance from Fluttershy was the beaten, bloody mess of a diamond dog. I felt sick. Even with the fatal wounds he had suffered, I recognised him as the dog we left unconscious in the tunnel, next to the one I killed. Evidently, he came to the surface seeking revenge. Averting my gaze from either of the corpses, I caught Pinkie's eyes. She was looking at me as if to say "Still think they ought to live?" and in an instant I knew the answer. "Slaughter all the brutes," I blurted out. "They're beyond pity, they don't deserve rehabilitation or redemption or a second chance."

Rainbow dash turned to face us and I saw the tears, which she had tried to hide, spilling down her cheeks. "I'll go sonic Rainbomb on them," she said, angrily, "They'll never know what hit them." The proposition was morally wrong; it would entail the genocide of a small community, whom we deem guilty by association with the few who had wronged us. But none of us were thinking of morality. We were distraught, we were tired and we just wanted someone to pay for what had happened that day. Nopony objected to the plan."

"Rarity, Spike, Appljack, Pinkie Pie and I made our way to a vantage point atop a grassy hill to watch Rainbow Dash execute our revenge. We had wrapped Fluttershy's body in large leaves and vines and taken her with us. The fitting thing to do would have been to lay our gentle, caring friend to rest before committing a mass murder she never would've wanted any part of, but we wanted to get our revenge as quickly as possible, callously prioritising it over our friend's funeral ceremony. Even from our distance, we felt the shockwave of the Rainbomb, heard the incredible boom and saw the multi-coloured mushroom cloud it produced. After a few minutes, we saw Rainbow Dash flying towards us. She seemed shaken, but she had survived what we hoped the dogs hadn't. That much force surely would've collapsed those tunnels. When Rainbow Dash met us, we moved onwards. There was no need for discussion at this point; we all knew the next destination was Flutterhy's house."

"We buried the gentle yellow Pegasus in a beautiful grassy clearing near her home. We knew she would prefer a small ceremony, and it was fitting that she should be returned to the earth, rather than kept in a crypt in Cloudsdale. Few words were spoken at the funeral. Splitting the group up had broken everypony's spirit, and personally I now found the company of the ponies I had put through hell to be awkward, rather than comforting. Rarity was the first to leave, no doubt blaming herself for what had happened as much as I blamed myself. She was followed by Applejack, who was distressed by what her friends had been through and probably wanted to drown her sadness in cider. Pinkie left next. It was impossible to tell exactly what she was feeling, but she seemed to be angry at everything, needing to blame somepony for her own suffering as well as Fluttershy's death. The look she gave me as she turned to leave convinced me that she blamed me entirely. Shortly thereafter, Spike started dozing off, so I took him home."

"While I was in the tunnel, I just wanted to get home, to escape the oppressive, cruel atmosphere underground. But it seems that the subterranean mood has followed me, and I feel a dark cloud hanging over my head. I have put my friends through terrible physical and emotional pain and suffering, all for zero gain. Rarity never needed rescuing. So what have I learned about friendship? Nothing. What have I achieved? Nothing. I want to make up for what I have done. I want to make amends. I want to earn my redemption. But there is no way I can redeem myself. I'm too tired to continue like this, I want to sleep but I know my dreams will be haunted by my horrific mistakes. My life, for all intents and purposes, is over.

Your faithful student,

_Twilight Sparkle_"


	2. Chapter 1: Pony on Melancholy

**Chapter One: Pony on Melancholy**

Rarity wallowed in melancholy at her desk with her head resting on her hoof. Normally she'd have a dramatic tantrum at the mildest amount of stress or frustration, but she didn't have the energy. Her friends came to rescue her, and had suffered greatly for it. If she came back faster or sent word that she was ok, the whole conundrum could have been avoided. Fluttershy would still be alive, the others wouldn't have been put through whatever torture they suffered, and they wouldn't have been taken in a bloodlust and killed an entire community of Diamond Dogs. She wanted to apologise to her friends and beg for forgiveness, but she couldn't muster the courage to face them. Besides, how could they possibly forgive her when she couldn't even forgive herself? Drinking cheap champagne, she spent the whole night moping at her desk. As she drifted in and out of sleep, she allowed her guilt and sorrow to manifest itself in her absolute depression.

As light flooded the room, Rarity was awakened from her mournful slumber in the hopes that her experience had just been a bad dream. Drearily gazing around the room, she saw the mud she had tracked in, smelt the alcohol in the air and became aware of her dull, throbbing headache. The room seemed to grow darker and close in around her at the realisation that it hadn't been a dream. Sighing to herself, she moved to the bathroom and proceeded to throw up in her toilet before making an effort to restore her appearance. Turning to the mirror, a bedraggled, ugly, messy pony with vomit on her mouth looked back at her. "I'm better than this," she said. Staring at her reflection she thought to herself "Well, obviously you're not." How could this happen? How could she have allowed this to happen? After washing her face, she sighed deeply and proceeded downstairs to make herself the greasiest, soggiest breakfast possible. It was never the preference of the glamour pony, but she knew it was the best meal for a hangover.

After breakfast, Rarity returned to her study to continue moping. She poured herself another glass of champagne, but rather than drinking it she stared at it intently. "What's the point?" she asked herself. Setting her glass down, she tried to think of the most positive course of action. In the past, other ponies had bent over backwards to help her get out of a poor mood. She knew that wasn't going to happen this time. After all, she was in the wrong this time. She felt nopony but herself could correct her misdeeds. There was no point in delaying any further. She wanted somepony to honestly forgive her. She just had to bite the bullet and talk it out with her friends.

When Rarity arrived at Sweet Apple Acres, she was somewhat surprised at what she found. Applejack was engaged in a heated yet unintelligent and one-sided argument with an apple tree. The drunken work pony seemed to be prepared to take the issue to blows, and Rarity approached with caution for fear of angering the powerful beast. "Buck you, I can eat all these apples," Applejack slurred, staring aggressively at the tree. Rarity cleared her throat before interrupting the imaginary dispute by saying "Excuse me, Appleja-" before being cut off when Applejack turned around hastily, fell over and picked herself up.

"Wha's that? That you Rarity? I'm kinda busy with this here varmint, sayin' mah mouth's makin' promises mah- well, mah mouth can't keep."

Rarity made some more awkward attempts at conversation over the next few minutes with no success; Applejack had her priorities set in stone. Just as she was about to give up and leave, she heard somepony behind her remark "Well, no surprises here." Turning around, Rarity saw that it was Pinkie Pie, looking much better than she had the day before, however she was still heavily bruised and scarred. Additionally, her hair was still straight. "Hello, Pinkie." Rarity said with a weak smile, "New hairdo? Looks good on you."

"Something like that," Pinkie replied with a look and tone of absolute seriousness, "but is that really what you want to talk about right now?" Rarity had hoped to ease into the subject, especially with Pinkie.

"So, how are you holding up, Pinkie?" she asked, trying to treat the issue with sensitivity.

Pinkie looked at Rarity incredulously, and said flatly "Rarity, look at me. How do you think I'm holding up?" After staring at Rarity for a few moments, Pinkie looked past her at Applejack. "It's disgusting, isn't it? She thinks she can drown her feelings in cider. She's going to waste the rest of her life because of this."

"Oh yes, dreadful..."

"It looks like we're all going to have to go through this individually. Again." Without looking at Rarity, Pinkie started walking back to Sugarcube Corner. "I'll see you around, Rarity."

"Pinkie, I'm sorry!" Rarity called after her.

"I bet you are," replied Pinkie without turning to face her.

Rarity felt like a cold dagger had been sunk into her heart. There was no comfort to be found with Applejack in her current state, and Pinkie was evidently unwilling to forgive her. With Rainbow Dash in Cloudsdale, she resolved to try and make some progress with Twilight.


	3. Chapter 2: A Thousand Thrills

**Chapter Two: A Thousand Thrills**

Rainbow Dash left her home to make the flight down to Ponyville. Weather management was an easy enough task for the fastest flyer out of Cloudsdale. She could clear a patch of sky in 10 seconds flat and spend the rest of the day napping. Still, to keep earning paycheques she'd have to put her thoughts aside and keep kicking clouds. The mayor overlooked Rainbow's nonchalant attitude towards her employment, but wouldn't tolerate unreasonable absences for very long.

Rainbow flexed her wings before diving off a cloud, gaining speed as she freefell towards the ground. Building velocity, she became increasingly aware of an unpleasant sensation. Normally, flight gave her a wonderful adrenalin rush which would bring her to a feeling of total elation. Now the faster she went, the sicker she felt. The feeling developed until Rainbow felt like she was throwing up, being winded, gasping for air and hyperventilating all at the same time. Her head throbbed as she struggled to keep herself from passing out or throwing up. For a moment, she thought she was back in the woods. In a flash she imagined the dogs being crushed under tonnes of soil, crying and suffocating. In addition to this murder, the destructive power of her Rainbomb seemed to have belatedly vaporised something inside her, leaving only a sickly feeling of emptiness. Rainbow shuddered and gasped as she halted mid-air. She looked around wide-eyed and erratically. The wide open sky seemed so suffocating and yet so desolate, as if the air itself was tightening and creating an inescapable bond. No matter how much air she took in, she couldn't quell her dizzying panic. Gawking at the ground stupidly, Rainbow flapped her wings in an awkward, panicked effort to remain airborne. With an enormous mental struggle she eventually managed to get herself under some measure of control. The ground seemed to be moving further and further away, but she forced herself to slowly descend. Still in a state of near hysteria, she finally landed on the ground and caught her breath.

Even on the safety of solid ground, Rainbow felt exposed and vulnerable. Her legs shook weakly. As the sickening sensation slowly subsided, immense shame settled in. It was as if all of Equestria had seen her embarrassing breakdown. She looked at the ground which she had been so desperate to reach. How could a Pegasus be afraid of heights? What was wrong with her? Rainbow tried to play down the situation and forced herself to become comfortably numb to her racing thoughts. She reasoned that she was probably just ill; she must have contracted a weird fever in the woods. There was nothing wrong with her, she was just unwell. Following this line of thought, Rainbow uneasily trotted to the local clinic.

"...so, what've I caught?" Rainbow finished after explaining her issue to the grey, aging unicorn stallion who was her doctor. She was uncomfortable with having to ask another pony for help, especially since she had to repeat such an embarrassing story. Her sense of pride, however, was nothing compared to her love of flight. She desperately wanted to go airborne again, so she didn't delay seeking medical expertise.

The doctor felt along the Pegasus's wings and replied "There's nothing physically wrong with you, Rainbow. Have you been under any extra stress or pressure recently?"

"No," Rainbow lied, too hastily to be convincing.

"Look, we all have problems. It's not healthy to repress your emotions. I'm here to help you, Rainbow. Talk to me."

"There's nothing wrong with me. Not like that, anyway. I was in the woods most of yesterday; I think I've caught something."

The doctor started at Rainbow concernedly for a moment before replying "Every pony from here to Canterlot must have seen that explosion, Rainbow. Let me help you. I mean, there is medication for this sort of thing, but I only recommend it as a last resort. You need to talk about this. You don't want to keep spiralling into depression. There's clearly-"

"I'm not crazy!" Rainbow interrupted, losing her temper, "you keep saying I need to talk, but you're not a very good listener if you don't get that. I'm telling you, I went to the woods and I caught a disease or something. That's it. All you need to do is take out your little prescription pad and give me something so that I can fly again."

"I didn't say you're crazy. There's nothing wrong with feeling down. It's perfectly normal to feel, let's say, less than magnificent from time to time. Keeping everything bottled up just makes things worse. Talk to me. Whatever you're feeling – sadness, pressure, guilt-"

"You did say something about there being medication for this though, huh?" Rainbow interrupted again, looking at the doctor with a slight smirk.

The doctor looked at his patient with disapproval and sighed with exasperation. Reluctantly, he filled out a prescription.

"It will make you feel better about yourself, but it'll never solve your problems. I'm here if you ever want to talk. " the doctor said as he handed the prescription to Rainbow.

"You just said that feeling bad about myself _is_ my problem, doc. Once I'm airborne, it'll be fine. A Pegasus is nothing without her wings." Rainbow took the prescription ad left the clinic.


	4. Chapter 3: Lesson Zero

The library was dark save for a small pool of artificial light, cast from a lamp in the middle of the circular room. It illuminated Twilight Sparkle as she stared intently at her book. Lying completely still she appeared to be in a near comatose state, but her mind was racing with the thoughts and feelings of a deeply troubled pony. Although her nose was stuck in a book, the latest antics of Daring Doo were the last thing on her mind. She was desperately trying to drive the events of the previous night thoroughly out of her memory. The more she tried to forget, the further she would slip into depression. She didn't want to be disturbed, and when there was a knock on the door she ignored it. Was it too much to ask for a little peace and quiet? After a few minutes, Rarity decided to let herself in. Twilight pretended she didn't notice her, but quickly realised that no matter how uncomfortable it was she'd have to talk to the fashion pony eventually.

Maintaining the guise of being thoroughly immersed in her book the purple pony slowly drawled, "You know, in these books there's always some sort of challenge the hero has to overcome. They go through a lot of trouble, make some sacrifices and sometimes some bad decisions, but they always get some sort of resolution. A definite end, you know?"

After a brief pause, Rarity swallowed and hastily blurted "I'm sorry, Twilight."

The purple pony looked at Rarity with genuine confusion. "Why?" she inquired, "It wasn't your fault. I'm the one who thought that it would be a harmless adventure. I'm the one who thought that we needed to keep pushing on to save you. I'm the one who didn't think her actions through. I'm the one who broke us up."

"No, darling, you-"

"No listen to me, Rarity, this was entirely my fault. I'm to blame. And it doesn't help my conscience knowing that other ponies are holding themselves responsible."

"There's no way you possibly could've known what would happen. You made the best judgement you could under the circumstances, and you mustn't blame yourself. You weren't even there when Fluttershy-"Rarity choked on her words for a moment, unable to even utter the atrocity. Her lip quivered as she attempted to maintain a straight face.

"That's just it, Rarity. I should have been there. I'm the element of magic. Keeping my friends together is my destiny. And I failed. How can I live with myself, knowing what my friends must be going through because of ME?"

Twilight's ears up pricked and her eyes widened. She felt a sudden surge of excitement as an idea crossed her mind. Maybe she would earn her redemption, her resolution, her conclusion. Perhaps she could amend her failure. As she her new plan, she completely ignored Rarity, who picked up on the scholar's absent-mindedness and gave a dejected look "I'll see you soon Twilight," Rarity said before turning to leave.

"I'm going to make this right," Twilight declared before the white unicorn stepped out the door.

"You don't need to, Twilight. Look, I have some thinking to do but I'll be in touch."

Twilight hardly noticed Rarity's farewell. She was rather excited about how she was going to save the day. From the bookshelf she summoned an ancient tome with "The Elements of Harmony and Starswirlian Archetypes: A Comparison" written across the deep blue cover in faded gold letters. The element of magic had erred, but was convinced that she would reunite the elements through the power of friendship. Immediately becoming totally absorbed in her research, she didn't notice one of her oldest and most loyal friends walk out the door after the element of generosity. Spike desperately wanted some pony to talk to, and Twilight was clearly in no such mood.

When Rainbow Dash knocked on the door of the library, Twilight answered immediately. Greeting her guest with unreasonable enthusiasm, she invited her to take a seat. Rainbow was briefly overwhelmed by her host's energy, and it took her a moment to notice that the librarian's appearance was as messy and unkempt as the library itself. The book cases seemed empty and bare as the majority of their contents were strewn across the floor. There was hardly any floor space that wasn't covered by some book, scroll or piece of parchment. Each item was indistinguishable and the whole area appeared to be one mass of paper. Taking no note of her guest's shock the host called out to Spike, requesting two cups of tea.

When Spike didn't respond, Twilight waved off his apparent disregard of her request saying "He's probably still sleeping," before joining the athlete on the couch. "So, is there anything I can do for you?" she continued, forcing a broad unsettling smile.

After a brief pause, Rainbow replied "umm, yea there is actually. See I can't go to Cloudsdale for a while, so do you mind if I crash here for a while?"

"Sure, great! Anything I can do would-"Twilight paused for a moment and twitched nervously before continuing "Would be great!"

For the better part of a minute the two ponies stared at each other in silence. The unicorn was putting on a wide, obviously forced grin. In return, the Pegasus skewed her face in confusion.

"So," continued the purple pony awkwardly, "why can't you go to Cloudsdale?" seeing Rainbow shift uncomfortably, she misjudged her uneasiness. "Oh, it's no imposition!" she exclaimed, "I love spending time with all my good friends! If there's any way I can help, I'm right here."

Rainbow chuckled awkwardly and said "You're starting to creep me out. And I'd really rather not talk about it."

Twilight's heart fell as her ears twitched down in sadness. She felt totally rejected. She made no effort to hide this fact as she slouched down and pouted sadly.

"Not that- sorry." Rainbow said hastily, trying to pull her friend out of her strange mood.

"No, no, no, don't be ridiculous, you have nothing to be sorry about. It's all just..." Twilight's voice trailed off and her eyes glazed over, lost in her own little world. The Pegasus stared at her uneasily. She was really starting to regret her decision to stay at the library. After the weird unicorn finished whatever train of thought she was on, she jumped off the couch and declared "Well, it's getting late, I'm off to bed! You know where the guest bed is. I'll see you in the morning!" The clock hadn't chimed 8pm yet.

With Twilight in bed Rainbow was left alone with her own thoughts. The Pegasus concluded that something truly terrible must have happened in the tunnels, and that she'd rather not know exactly what. She had some concern over Twilight's unusual behaviour, but her primary fear was for her own future. Retrieving the small bottle of pills she'd picked up at the clinic from under her wing, she read the instructions "Take one pill once per day as directed". For a moment, the fresh memories of the woods seemed to flash before her eyes again. With a shiver she concluded that the prescription was for regular depression. The Pegasus felt at least doubly depressed. She poured two pills onto her hoof and swallowed them. Feeling like she had nothing worthwhile to do, she followed the unicorn in hitting the hay early.


	5. Chapter 4: Amazing Grace

Chapter Four: Amazing Grace

Applejack awoke in a puddle of her own vomit under an apple tree, her body contorted in an awkward position. Her stomach churned as her head throbbed with pain. The slightest rustle of leaves sounded like a freight train filled with malfunctioning smoke detectors and vuvuzelas rocketing past at full speed. The apple bucker summoned her strength in an attempt to stand on all fours. Just as she began to collect herself, she collapsed as her stomach rejected a large amount of acid and cider, adding to the already copious mess. She desperately wanted to get up and wash the sick from her body, but she simply didn't have the energy. Letting out an exasperated moan, she allowed herself to collapse and closed her eyes, ready to sleep again.

"Applejack?" called a concerned voice.

"Scram, Applebloom," replied Applejack, attempting to fix her eyes on her sister who was slowly making her way towards her.

"What happened?"

"Yah sister's old enough to take care of herself. Get on out of here, I just need some rest."

Big Macintosh was taking all this in, distracted from his apple bucking duties. He trotted over and, without a word and ignoring her protests, pushed Applebloom back to the house. Thinking she finally had peace, Applejack closed her eyes and rested her head back on the putrid, vomit-covered ground with a loud moan.

Her rest was interrupted again as Big Macintosh grabbed her by the tail and started to pull. She made some weak attempts of resistance before giving up. She was no match for her brother's strength at the best of times. After a short, uncomfortable and humiliating drag, Big Macintosh plunged her into a small and cold pond. She scrambled to the edge and choked for breath. Pulling herself up the muddy embankment, she managed to find her feet and regain some composure.

"Gosh darn it, I don't know whether I should thank ye or hate ye," Applejack said with a slight smile once she'd regained her breath.

"Eeup."

"Where's mah hat?"

The stallion nodded towards the dirty hat lying in the puddle of filth Applejack had been trying to sleep in.

"Errr... I think I'll deal with that later," Applejack said, skewing her face with disgust, "I've gotta head into town and get some er – well, you know."

"Nope," Big Macintosh said unusually sternly, placing a hoof on his sister's back to stop her.

"Now I 'preciate the concern, but I'm big girl, mac. Ah can take care o' mahself."

Big Macintosh looked at the puddle of filth, then back to Applejack. He tilted his head and raised his eyebrows in the most condescending way possible.

"Now don't ya'all look at me like that!"

"Why are you doing this to yourself?"

"To forget. Now forget you, I'mma go buy me some apple bucking alcohol!"

Applejack made her way through Ponyville towards the bottle shop. She looked somewhat presentable now, thought she was bare-headed because she hadn't yet bothered to clean her hat. As she was about to step into the store, she was seized by apprehension. She considered that stepping into the store would set her down a path ending in a puddle of vomit. Indeed, it may lead down a path where every day begins in a puddle of vomit until an early grave. Was this really what she wanted? The money wasn't an issue; The Apple family had held a monopoly over cider production and distribution for generations, seasonally dipping their toes in retail. A word from one of the Apples and the town could run dry for a very long time. As such, Applejack knew she could get some booze on the house. Still, it may ruin her life. Furthermore, it would harm her family. Applejack knew she was a mean drunk; she didn't want to consider what she might do to Applebloom or herself if she lost control. Her train of thought was interrupted when a young, white pegasus mare with a long, sleek blue mane introduced herself.

"Hello. My name is Sage."

"What? Oh, howdy there. I'm Applejack"

"How are you today?"

"Um- fine, just fine."

Sage paused briefly before smiling magnificently and continuing, "I represent the society of the Hand. We are an organisation that offers the gift of enlightenment to any pony who will accept it."

"Sorry, sugar cube, not interested."

"I can tell you're not really fine, Applejack. Do you want to use this," the radiant pegasus gestured towards the liquor store, "as a crutch your whole life? The Hand can guide you through difficult times. The Hand shows you the proper way to live. The Hand can be your salvation."

Applejack, who sometimes made the mistake of assuming there's an element of honesty in those around her as well as herself, was intrigued. "Well, what in the hay is a hand anyway?"

"The Hand is the force that drives everything in nature. Everything that happens is part of the Hand's divine plan. We hold meetings every evening, just after sunset, in the hall to the south of Sugar Cube Corner. If you truly want to reconcile your feelings and live a pure life, be there. No obligations, no pressure. The bottle is the devil's left hoof, Applejack. We can set you down the path to salvation."

Applejack glanced from Sage to the store and back again. How convenient that this young mare was here to help her at her time of weakness. Perhaps it was a sign? Maybe there was a better way after all. Besides, with no obligation, she really had nothing to lose.


	6. Chapter 5: Unhappy Girl

As Pinkie Pie returned to Sugar Cube Corner she tried to look as casual as possible, but couldn't help carrying herself as if she was lifting a heavy load. The scar that ran diagonally across her face showed her physical suffering to the whole town and her deflated, straight hair was known to be a sign that the element of laughter had been taken by a strange mood. Every now and then a pony would approach her with questions and ignorant reassurance. Each time Pinkie would respond with "No time to chat, sorry!" along with a forced smile and wave. She felt naked and exposed; it seemed every pony in Ponyville could read her emotions right off her face, as if they could see into her mind. Feeling powerless against the piercing gazes of her friends, she quickened her pace to escape the relentlessly questioning eyes of the town.

When she finally arrived at Sugar Cube corner, the pink pony tried to stealthily move up to her room before the Cakes had a chance to interrogate her. She saw the stairs up to her room as an escape. If she could reach that isolated sanctuary, she would be safe from the insufferable questioning of other ponies. With mere feet before the stair case, the wrecked mare heard Mrs Cake call from behind her "Pinkie, mind if we have a word?"

Unable to think of a reasonable excuse to turn her employer and landlord down, she replied "Sure thing, Mrs C!" with unconvincing, forced enthusiasm.

Mrs Cake paused to swallow deeply before continuing in a caring tone, "Pinkie, is there anything you want to talk about?"

"Umm... nope! Well, it's been great chatting with you. I won't take up any more of your time," she smiled widely.

"Hold it, Pinkie," Mrs Cake said before the pink pony had a chance to retreat upstairs, "We- err- you don't look so good. How are you feeling?"

"Just fine, thanks Mrs Cake!"

Mrs Cake's eyes narrowed in concern and she briefly bit her lip before continuing, "We got a letter from Celestia -"

"Oh, of course. Twilight must've sent one of her letters to her beloved mentor," Pinkie's smile disappeared and her face darkened tremendously as she interrupted, "and then the Princess told you all about it. That wasn't her call to make. I mean, she can do what she wants. Duh, she's the princess. But she had no right to..." Pinkie trailed off, realising that she was skirting on the edge of treason.

Mrs Cake took a few steps towards her employee and replied "The princess wants what's best for you. So do we. We care about you, Pinkie. You're like a daughter to us."

"This must be really eating you up on the inside, Pinkie," Mr Cake called as he entered from the back room, "We're real good listeners. Talk to us. Let all the unhappiness out."

"I really don't want to talk about it," Pinkie replied as every trace of joy and innocence left her face and voice, leaving stern sincerity.

"Look, we know Fluttershy was a very dear friend of yours," Mrs Cake said, disregarding Pinkie's statement, "but it's no good to just bottle up all your boo-hoos. We've all lost someone special to us at some stage before. We can help you through this, Pinkie."

"Your scars will heal by themselves, but every pony needs a helping hoof to work their way through times like this," added Mr Cake.

The pink pony narrowed her eyes with incredulity as she asked "So, you think you've been through something like what happened to me in the tunnels?"

"Of course!" exclaimed Mrs Cake, mistaking Pinkie's disbelief for genuine interest, "Most ponies our age have seen a loved one leave us. I, for example, was standing by my father's death bed when he passed."

"And you think that compares to what happened to me?"

"Well, I suppose since you weren't related to Fluttershy it might be a bit different."

Pinkie was dumbfounded. She stared at Mrs Cake for a few minutes, trying to digest what she had told her. She had an overwhelming urge to yell at her employer; to grab her by the mane and shake her, screaming "You have no idea what you're talking about! I went through Tartarus and back in those tunnels, and when I finally emerged I saw one of my best friends had been ripped apart by the dogs. The most gentle, kind pony I've ever met was brutally killed, just like that," but the words never reached her lips. She continued to stare in stunned silence, which was probably in her best interests. Berating your landlord and employer isn't generally a good idea.

Mr Cake eventually broke the quiet. "Oh, and don't blame yourself about it, Pinkie. Way I read Celestia's letter, seems there was nothing you could do about it. Besides, by the looks of you, I'd say you put up a hay of a fight! I've had a few scuffles myself in my younger days, believe it or not. Just remember, you did the best you could under the circumstances. Hindsight is 20-20, and your war wounds will heal up in time," He said with a slight smile.

"Wow-"Pinkie began before checking herself, recovering her chain of thought and continuing, "Ok, thanks for all the, er, help. Mind if I get a bit of rest? I'm still tired from my... scuffle."

"Oh, of course, go right ahead sweetheart!" Mrs Cake replied warmly.

Pinkie stared at the Cake couple for a moment, hiding her anger behind an unemotional face. Normally, she would have no qualms vocally and mindlessly expressing her thoughts. It just didn't seem right to do that now. She was dealing with ponies who had no idea what they were talking about, but insisted on bringing up a sensitive topic with bad memories attached to it. How could she possibly show them how wrong they were? With an exasperated snort she made her way to her room.

The pink pony wept softly as she pondered her situation. Was the rest of her life going to be like this? Would ponies always be acting like they understood what she'd been through? Pinkie knew she'd never be at peace if she was constantly reminded of what happened in the tunnels. She wanted to move on, but evidently no pony would let her. The false empathies of the Cakes brought back the pure rage she felt in the tunnels. She uselessly thrashed her forelegs against her pillow with all her might in frustration. If only they could understand what she'd been through. Their sympathies wouldn't seem so hollow then.

Continuing her frantic assault, the troubled young mare imagined everyone she wanted to hurt in the pillow's position. The element of laughter forced herself to see diamond dogs in place of the cushion, imagining the feeling of their bodies going limp under her blows. She saw Mrs Cake finally understanding what she had been through, cowering in fear as the terror flashed in her eyes. She saw all the ponies who had questioned her, pushed her down, and treated her as weak. She saw them understanding her pain. Pinkie took great joy in the fantasy of asserting her dominance over them. Her hair suddenly inflated back into its original wild, frizzy state. A wide smile spread across her face as she felt the power surging through her body. The pink pony was back with renewed vigour and a plan to take control of her life.


	7. Chapter 6: Art of the Escape

Weeping softly to herself, Rarity packed her personal belongings. The designs she had devoted so many years to seemed worthless and shallow, but she'd need them in her new life. Magically holding a gem-encrusted dress in front of her, she gazed at the obnoxiously sparkly stones. So this is what it had all been for? Fluttershy had died for a garnish on an outfit. Rarity shuddered as she violently cast it aside, disgusted with herself. It was the first time she'd ever questioned the merits of materialistic vanity. On some level she wanted to abandon the whole fashion industry, but it was the only lifestyle she'd ever known. Gazing at her cutie mark, she realised it was imbedded too deeply in her; a pony can't simply abandon their destiny. The fashion pony wouldn't be switching careers any time soon. She resolved to embrace fabulousity further, starting a new life away from her bad memories. Canterlot, the city of angels, was close enough to Ponyville to make moving relatively easy yet the culture was so different that there would be nothing to remind Rarity of her past. Hopefully the wealth and class in the city would soon drown out memories of a backwater town like Ponyville.

The element of generosity didn't want to talk to any of her friends face to face. Her motivation for skipping town was to escape the wave of depression following the shock of what happened in the tunnels and the woods. Still, she needed to communicate her intention to them or they would come looking for her. Resolving to get the task over and done with she sat at her desk, summoned a quill and parchment and wrote her going away letter. "Dear Twilight, Pinkie Pie, Applejack and Rainbow Dash," she wrote, "Circumstances have given me no option other than to leave Ponyville forever. Don't make any attempt to contact me. I have moved away and I shan't be coming back. We were once a circle of pony friends, but our circle has been broken beyond repair. I cannot stand to face any of you again. I am incredibly sorry for all I have done to you. I can never be forgiven for what happened in the woods. Goodbye forever, -Rarity." Sighing to herself, she re-read the letter over before leaving the note on the desk.

Rarity gazed around her boutique which was now ready for liquidation. The money she'd saved over the years plus what she could get for her beautifully built and immaculately kept boutique would get her a small studio apartment in one of the lower socio-economic boroughs of Canterlot. The downgrade was to be expected; Canterlot was an expensive city. Even with the significant loss she'd have to stay in a cheap motel out of the city until an affordable apartment came up for sale. Despite the inconvenience, Rarity felt it was her only option. As she sealed another box she heard a bell ring, notifying her someone had entered the shop. Assuming it was a pony interested in the liquidation sale, she turned to face the door. Her heart dropped as she saw Spike enter.

"What are you doing?" inquired the shocked baby dragon.

"Oh, Spike. You weren't supposed to see this!"

"What are you doing?" repeated the dragon in an offended tone.

"Well, look around!" Rarity snapped defensively, waving her hoof over the clothing displayed on sale and the luggage she was packing.

Spike was momentarily taken aback, but a smile crept on his face as he disregarded the pony's apparent intention and replied "Come on, Rarity, don't be such a drama queen."

"I'm serious, Spike."

"It's been one day!" the dragon's voice cracked as he became aware of her sincerity, "Sure, none of us will really get over it, but you're probably still in shock over the whole thing. Don't make any big decisions right now, you'll regret it later."

"I've dreamt of moving to Canterlot since I was a filly, but I never really had the opportunity. This..." Rarity trailed off, unable to find words to express her predicament, before continuing "This unpleasantness merely tipped the scales."

"So you're just running away?"

"I'm not running. I'm simply reconsidering my options, and I've decided that this chapter of my life has come to a close."

"You can't just leave us," the baby reptilian moved across the room towards Rarity as his eyes began to swell, "I- we need you."

"Spike, I've made my decision. I know it seems a tad reckless but, I'm resolved now. I'm sure Twilight will take care of you."

The young dragon searched his brain for something, anything that could convince her to stay. Unable to find the words he wanted, he settled for "I don't think we can pull through without you. I don't think I can make it without you."

"You need to be strong, Spikey Wikey. For both of us," Rarity hesitated. What if her friends really needed her? She couldn't bring herself to sever ALL possible ties with them. "Spike- I'm going to tell you something but you have to promise not to repeat it to any pony unless it's an absolute, dire, life or death emergency."

"Anything for you. I promise I won't tell a soul."

Rarity regarded her admirer carefully for a moment. When she was satisfied that his face showed pure sincerity and honesty she continued, "I'm moving to Canterlot. I'll be staying in a cheap motel called "The Starving Artist" until I can find an apartment somewhere in the city. If there is some sort of emergency, and you absolutely need me-"

"I get it," Spike interrupted.

"I'll miss you, Spike."

"So this is really goodbye? Game over, the end?"

"Let's call it a fresh start," Rarity said with a smile, "Here, something to remember me by." She leaned in and kissed the baby dragon lightly on the cheek.

Blushing brightly and with a coy smile spreading across his face, Spike was felt powerless against the unicorn's will. He slowly moved to the door where he halted.

"Well, it's your call. Maybe I'll see you again someday, huh?"

"Sure, Spike. Someday."

The dragon nodded as the smile left this face. He sighed to himself and held back tears, trying to stay strong, as he closed the door behind him.


	8. Chapter 7: This can Only End Well

Rainbow Dash awoke feeling no better than she had the previous day. She immediately clutched her hoof to her stomach, attempting to suppress a sensation that felt like her insides were being compressed together, creating a tight knot in her stomach surrounded by a terrible emptiness. With a sickly groan, she decided that her meds must have worn off. The run down pegasus reached for the bottle, which was still tucked under her wing. She was only supposed to need one dosage per day, and it was still early morning. Well maybe a fine, athletic, well built specimen of a pegasus such as herself needed a more concentrated dosage. The two pills she had already taken seemed to tide her over for the night, so she deduced that to get through a day and a night she'd need at least double. She poured four pills onto her hoof and peered into the bottle. There was just one lonely pill remaining. Well, what harm could one extra pill do? She'd need to pick up more that day anyway. Making sure Twilight was still asleep to avoid questioning, she swallowed all five pills.

It wasn't long before Rainbow started feeling irrationally good. She sat in bed, smiling broadly at how damn incredible she was. Her body was limp, but she felt like she could jump up and hit the ground running at any moment. Her mind was swamped with warm, fuzzy thoughts and she forgot altogether about the awful sensation that had been washing over her moments before. What was the doctor talking about? This was clearly the correct dosage; it made her feel much better about herself than any amount of talking.

As the Pegasus felt her mood soaring, the unicorn awoke in a suffocating depression. Feeling like she hadn't slept in days, she struggled to drag herself out of bed and wiped the sleet from her eyes. Finally standing on all fours, Twilight Sparkle felt her limbs stiffen. Even though the pony was awake, every inch of her body seemed to resist any attempted movement. Giving up, she sat on her bed and gazed around stupidly, as if in a daze. It took her a few moments to perceive the colourful Pegasus pony beaming at her.

"Hey, Twilight!" said Rainbow with a grin.

"Well, you look cheerful," replied Twilight, failing to imitate her friend's ecstatic look.

"How're you doing?"

"Been better. It's good to see that you've gotten back on your feet so quickly."

Rainbow chuckled mindlessly, "Lighten up Twi. Life is an adventure. Every day is a new day and I feel great!"

Twilight looked at Rainbow quizzically. Was her mindless ecstasy a coping mechanism or had she genuinely gotten over the event in less than two days? Rarity said that they all needed to move on with their lives; maybe the other ponies were doing just that. Maybe Twilight was the only one who was so distraught over what happened. Maybe she was the only one with a reason to beat herself up about it. The scholar considered the situation carefully, analysing and trying to make sense of it. Being so absorbed in her thoughts, she didn't even notice the uncomfortable silence that ensued as she stared concernedly at the floor, biting her lip.

"Yea so anyway," Rainbow said awkwardly, maintaining a wide smile, "I need to go to town and get some things. I might be able to make it back to Cloudsdale today, but if I don't, you mind if I crash here again?"

"What? Oh, yea. Sure, sure."

"Great. I'll see you later."

Rainbow jumped out of bed and her limbs shook excitedly. Her walk was somewhat erratic and uneven, and she breathed heavily with each short, quick step. Sweat from her brow was running down her face. Twilight was trapped in contemplation and noticed none of this.

The doctor frowned down at Rainbow Dash concernedly before saying "You took a week's dosage within 24 hours?

"Well, yea, but that was a week's dosage for regular depression in a regular pony. I'm super depressed and I'm better than most ponies," Rainbow Dash answered as she crossed her forelegs, hunching on the bed. The smile on the pegasus's face had been replaced with a grumpy scowl.

"I knew filling out that prescription was a mistake," muttered the stallion as his brow furrowed in frustration.

"Look, just fill out a bigger prescription this time. It's an easy mistake for an egg head like you to make. Some ponies can't recognise the fine physical specimen that is Rainbow Dash when they see it."

"That's not what I meant. Look, relying on these pills can be dangerous. It's a treatment rather than a cure, and a rather poor one-"

"Look, doc, I know how I feel. These pills make me feel better than any amount of talking could. Just get out your little prescription pad and get me some more of them!" Rainbow was starting to get annoyed at the doctor. Sure, he was a professional, but only she could tell how she felt.

"Legally I couldn't prescribe more so soon even if I wanted to. At this point, it's apparent that those pills will only harm you. I urge you to see-"

"Look, you're wrong, ok? I'm sick, these pills make me better. That's all I need to know and it's all that needs to be discussed. If you won't help me, I'll find a doctor who will."

Rainbow got up and headed for the door. As she was about to leave the doctor called, "Rainbow, have you tried flying yet? You won't be able to. You can barely walk straight. If you keep using medication as a crutch, you'll start losing strength in your wings. You may never fly again."

Rainbow stopped in her tracks. Looking back at her wings she flapped them a few times. They moved easily enough, but seemed less flexible than usual. Her heart sank. She loved flying, and couldn't bear the thought of losing her gift as a pegasus. After flexing her wings for a moment, she looked past them at her doctor. The stallion who had tried to convince her that talking would make her feel better than the pills. What did he know? Her wings were probably just a bit stiff from lack of use. Convincing herself that the doctor was merely a quack, she gave a bemused snort before folding her wings. She walked out of the clinic without saying another word.


	9. Chapter 8: I Can See Your Face

Rainbow Dash sat in a blissful daze leaning against a bookshelf in Twilight's library. She had managed to find several different doctors in Ponyville and beyond, each unaware of the others' prescription. With enough doctors doling pills out, Rainbow could obtain as much medication as she wanted. She decided to increase her dosage for that night because she was feeling tired and stressed from a day of doctor shopping. After emptying a couple of bottles into her mouth, she was in a state of pure joy teetering in a twilight zone between consciousness and unconsciousness. She was remembering the happiest times of her life. When she was free. When she was innocent.

The pegasus's eyes were closed, yet she could see so clearly. She was soaring over Cloudsdale, zipping around with incredible speed and agility, light and free. Nonchalantly gazing down at the cloud city, she spotted a small yellow filly, shrinking in submission before three of her classmates. Rainbow was unsure why, but she was drawn to her. The filly needed her help, she was just doing what any decent young pegasus would do. As she stood up to the bullies, her world became a blur and the sense of pride was replaced by the wonderful sensation of wind rushing through her mane.

Rainbow Dash was pushing herself to the limit. One of the colts had fallen far behind, but the other had just rammed her from the side. She wouldn't take that. Focusing all her energy into generating downward force, she raced past the foal. Leaving him far behind she continued to accelerate, wanting to make the defeat as humiliating as possible. A visible cone of air formed around her hooves. This was the moment. With all her might she urged herself to accelerate. In a few fleeting moments which felt like an eternity, she hit the sound barrier. There was moment of pure silence, followed by a deafening roar. A wave of rainbows spread across the countryside, almost as brilliant and vibrant as the one following her. Looking back she saw the tail of the sonic rainboom streaming behind her, and the cutie mark form on her flank. In that surge of wonderful adrenalin, the vision faded and her memory flashed forward.

Why did she have to leave? Her place was in Cloudsdale, not in Ponyville with a bunch of apple bucking mud ponies. Rainbow almost wished she could follow Fluttershy to the ground. She had been her best friend for over five years, ever since the sonic rain boom. The athlete decided to confide in the frail yellow Pegasus privately. Maybe she could talk some sense into her. They shared more than friendship; surely it was a bond that could never be broken.

"Hey, Fluttershy," Rainbow Dash said, entering the yellow pegasus's room.

"Oh, hello Rainbow Dash," Replied the yellow filly with a smile.

"Why are you doing this?" the athlete demanded, wasting no time in getting to the point.

"I was afraid you'd ask that," the gentle pony sighed.

"You don't belong down there."

"Lots of pegasi live in Ponyville, Rainbow."

"Yea well, you're better than them! You're from Cloudsdale, not some random cloud village out in the sticks. You belong here."

"Oh, Rainbow. Ever since I first landed there and got my cutie mark, the idea of life on the ground is all I've been able to think about. It's like a prison up here. No pony here but you likes me, and I'm not much of a flier. I don't stand a chance at a decent life in this place. Try to understand."

"You'd have every chance! You know I'll always stick up for you."

"Please don't make this harder than it already is, Rainbow. I have to do this. I love it down there. I... really, really don't like it up here. I have no family and one friend." Tears were welling up in the gentle pony's eyes as she continued, "It's taken me years to prepare for this. I've made my decision."

The fastest filly in flight school was taken aback by the assertion in her usually timid friend's voice. This shock was overshadowed by empathy, as she saw her friend on the verge of tears. Struggling to keep a straight face, she croaked, "but what about me?"

"We can visit each other at any time."

"You know that's not true."

Fluttershy bowed her head. Any Pegasus who abandons Cloudsdale would be seen as a weakling and a coward. Rainbow Dash would be viewed the same way if she was seen with a filthy emigrant. Her life in the clouds would be over. Her prospects would be worse than Fluttershy's.

Without a word, Fluttershy wrapped her forelegs around her friend's neck and drew her into a tight hug, weeping into her shoulder. After a moment of hesitation, Rainbow returned the gesture, squeezing the weeping pony tightly. The proud, athletic filly allowed her emotions to get the best of her and let the tears roll down her cheeks. They were only kids, and they shared a feeling that none of this was fair. It felt like it was them against a cruel world, and their only weapon in the fight was the comforting warmth of their embrace.

When they finally broke apart, both ponies felt physically and emotionally exhausted. Their gaze met, and they saw the defeat in each others' eyes. Both realised it was hopeless. They were split up by a society that wouldn't tolerate deviance from the norm. They had lost.

Once again, Rainbow Dash's surge of emotions got the best of her. Just as she had prepared herself for the rain boom, she cleared her mind and prepared herself to make a move. She summoned every ounce of her courage and leaned towards the yellow pony. Without hesitation, she pecked her lightly on the lips.

Fluttershy didn't return the kiss. She pulled back slightly as her eyes widened in surprise. After a brief awkward silence she began, "Oh... my. Rainbow, I just-"

"I- I'm sorry," Rainbow Dash replied hastily, backing away from the startled filly, "I don't know why I did that." She was panicking, her eyes twitching rapidly. Sweat built on her brow as she reversed further from the yellow Pegasus.

"I, um-"

"No, don't even think about it. I'll, er, I'll just go now. Yea. See yah around," the blue filly hastily blurted out as she fled, trying to outrun her embarrassment.

Fluttershy followed her to the door and called out "You're like a sister to me!" but got no answer.

As her voice faded, so did the alluring décor and architecture of Cloudsdale, replaced by the lush greenery of the outskirts of Ponyville and Fluttershy's cottage.

As she poised to knock on the door, Rainbow hesitated. She was starting to get cold hooves and have second thoughts. It wasn't too late to go back to Cloudsdale. They'd welcome her back, glad to see the number one late teen flier rejoin them. Fraternising with a filthy ground dweller would seal her fate as an outcast. She wouldn't be officially banished, but she'd never be accepted by Cloudsdale's community. Especially since she was already a suspected filly fooler, one of the many things frowned upon by the fanatically patriotic and closed-minded pegasi of the ancient city. Before she could properly consider these thoughts, the door swung open and the yellow pegasus, now almost fully grown, emerged before shrieking in shock and collapsing to the ground.

"You- you- Rainbow Dash! Oh- startled me," the astonished mare stammered incomprehensibly as she picked herself up.

"Hey there, Fluttershy. You remember me, then?" replied the fastest flyer to abandon Cloudsdale with a coy smile.

"W-what are you doing here? You should go! Cloudsdale will never-"

"Yea, and maybe I don't wanna live in Cloudsdale anymore," interrupted the athlete, "you can't do anything there. They wanna tell you what to do, what to think, what to feel. It's like you're not even a pony, you're just part of this big..." she trailed off, realising she had begun to rant.

"I understand," replied Fluttershy, now in her regular tone, "Oh, um, come in. If you want"

The two pegasi walked in but neither sat down. After staring at each other in awkward silence for a while, Fluttershy tried to start the conversation. "So, um, how are you?" she asked.

"I ran away from my home town 'cause they didn't like my filly fooling," Rainbow Dash replied incredulously, "take a guess."

"Oh- I didn't mean – I'm sorry."

"This was stupid, we haven't seen each other in years. I don't even know why I came here."

Another silence ensued, and was once again broken by the shy mare. After a moment, Fluttershy sat on a two pony lounge. "Hey, why don't you take a seat?" she asked with a slight smile, tapping a hoof at the space next to her. As Rainbow sauntered towards her long lost crush, the world melted before her eyes and was replaced by another vision.

Her dilated pupils stood out brilliantly on her cyan irises. Fluttershy's bright eyes had Rainbow totally captivated, as if her mind, heart and soul were momentarily lost. The couple smiled with their forelegs wrapped tightly around each others' body. She had suffered through years of persecution and self doubt, but Rainbow Dash finally got her girl, the light of her life.

"Like a sister, huh?" Rainbow chuckled as she pulled her lover closer.

Squeezing her mare friend, the drugged up pegasus desperately tried to hold onto the thoughts and feelings that were swelling through her. Before she knew what was happening the dream was gone, replaced by her worst nightmare.

The content loving gaze staring back at her turned to a shocked expression of pure fear and pain. Looking her up and down in disbelief, Rainbow Dash made her best attempt to put pressure on the gaping cut in Fluttershy's torso. It was no use. Warm blood continued to spill as both ponies grew pale. The element of loyalty felt totally useless.

"Come on, Fluttershy, you can make it. Stay with me!" she cried between sobs.

The dying pony gurgled and let out what was almost a chuckle. "You'll find me again."

Rainbow Dash watched in horror while the life left her best friend. The most important pony in her life. Unable to escape the dream, the junkie remained trapped in what had become a bad trip.


	10. Chapter 9: Ponies are Strange

Applejack knocked on Twilight's door with good intentions and high hopes. She had embraced the way of the Hand at the meeting the night before and felt like she had been renewed. The promises of eternal happiness in the afterlife comforted her, having just lost a friend. Moreover, the idea that everything was part of The Hand's divine plan made her feel much better about the whole ordeal; there was nothing she could've done to stop it. Everything happened as the Hand dictated it. Everything was good.

Twilight Sparkle was still in a poor mood when she answered the door, and Applejack picked up on this immediately. Offering a sympathetic smile, she said "Howdy sugar cube. Come round the others up with me. We all need to talk."

"You're right. There's no use sitting around moping all day. We have to work through this together. It's the way we've always done it. Rainbow Dash is staying with me at the moment but she's out. By the time we get Pinkie and Rarity she'll probably be back."

Together, the pair trotted onwards to Sugar Cube Corner.

Pinkie appeared to have coped with the incident even better than Applejack. Her hair was frizzy and wild once more. Despite her facial scar and a few other noticeable injuries, she was carrying herself in regular Pinkie Pie style.

"Wow Pinkie, you look good, all things considered" remarked Twilight.

Pinkie looked at Twilight weirdly for a moment before averting her gaze and saying "Thanks."

Arriving at Carousel Boutique, the trio of ponies were taken aback by how empty the place appeared from outside. Twilight let herself into the shop. There was no sign of the white unicorn.

"Hello? Rarity?" she called out.

The lavender pony dismissed her concern at the lack of response; the fashion pony had probably just forgotten to lock up on her way out to the beauty salon. That was a pretty typical way for her to handle any sort of stress. In a last effort to find her friend, Twilight strolled into the study, where a small piece of paper had been placed clearly on the desk. Pinkie and Applejack entered the room after her and she magically held the note in front of her and read it aloud.

"I can't believe she'd just up 'n' leave us like that," said Applejack when Twilight finished reading.

"She said she wanted to move on. I didn't think she meant literally. I should have put more stock into her words, I guess."

"Shoulda coulda woulda, Twi," Pinkie replied energetically, "I'm guessing that's something you've been running through your head a lot over the past couple of days, huh?"

Twilight bowed her head and sighed. "Let's just go. It's getting late. Rainbow Dash will probably be back now."

The ponies plodded in depressed silence back to the library.

Rainbow Dash was totally unaware of the group of three ponies who walked in and gathered around her concernedly. Eventually, the other ponies stopped trying to communicate with the Pegasus and began talking amongst themselves.

"She's out of it," said Applejack.

"What happened to her?" asked Twilight.

"She's high as hay. Hasn't overdosed, but to get this out of it she must've been popping pills like skittles" Pinkie stated simply. In response to the confused look on Twilight's and Applejack's faces she continued, "Oh, the rock farm was such a dull, boring, depressing place. Sometimes you need a little pick-me-up in an environment like that! I've seen this before. Honestly, I've been this before."

"Now that I think about it, she was acting strangely this morning."

"Well shoot, once ya'all have heard what I got to tell ye, you won't be needing to rely on nothin' to get through these hard times."

Applejack proceeded to explain all about the Hand, the way of the Hand, and the wonderful implications of the Hand. She was so thoroughly adsorbed in her story that she didn't heed the incredulous looks her long sermon was attracting from her friends. When she finally finished, Pinkie and Twilight stared at her in silence for a moment.

Considering her response carefully, Twilight began "That's – "

"- silly," Pinkie interrupted, "You think that everything is out of our control? That we're all just part of some great plan? And you like this feeling? Yea, I'll take control of my own life, thanks."

"Look, Applejack, we've all been through a lot. I think you might be trying to use this whole "Hand" thing as a crutch to help carry a heavy emotional burden. You need to realise it's an encumbrance we share, and we can help each other keep moving despite the load. We can only get through this together; our strength has always come from each other. It's not healthy to delude yourself into being happy. I mean, look at Rainbow Dash here. We've lost Fluttershy and Rarity. We'll lose Rainbow if we don't do something. I don't want to lose you too."

Pinkie snorted and replied "Oh, playing the hero again, Twi?" she paused to look at Twilight with indignation before proceeding, "You've always been so good at that. You really think you know what's best for every pony, don't you?"

Receiving no reply, the pink pony proceeded in little more than a whisper, "I've found a way to get my life under control. I'm not some weakling who needs to rely on her old friends. If you girls want to waste your lives with your escapism, delusions and fantasies of heroic redemption, be my guest. Hey, some ponies prefer an antihero, Twi."

She paused and shook her head angrily while catching her breath. Swallowing hard, she smiled at the wannabe hero and continued "Might wanna drag Dashie off to the doc, by the way. She'll probably be fine, but it's better to be safe than sorry, right?" Pinkie bounced off before any pony had a chance to reply.

Twilight whimpered slightly and said "What just happened?"

"Look like our Pinkie's learned some new words, huh?" the earth pony chuckled.

"What's happening to us?"

"Err, look Twi, I'll be leaving now. And for the record," said Applejack in an offended tone, "ye have no right to belittle my beliefs like ye did before."

Twilight watched her friend leave before gazing at the stoned Rainbow Dash. All her friends seemed to be irreparably broken. How far reaching would the consequences of her mistake be?


	11. Chapter 10: Life's a Party

Pinkie Pie waited patiently for Mr and Mrs Cake to regain consciousness. They were well restrained and she could've left them there waiting for her, but she was hopelessly excited and wanted to get started as quickly as possible. She was very well prepared; both of her victims were firmly secured to their own sturdy wooden table with modified belts on each leg as well as one on the neck acting as makeshift straps. Pinkie had tilted both the tables to a nearly 45 degree angle so that she wouldn't have to awkwardly stoop over while interacting with her employers. She had a wheeled tray on standby, stocked with the various tools she'd need. All she had to do was wait for the Cakes to wake up.

Mrs Cake was the first to regain consciousness. She lifted her head slightly and dopily took in her surroundings. With difficulty, her eyes focused on Pinkie, who was now leaning over her with a wicked smile on her face.

"Hi!" the Pink Pony said excitedly.

"What?" was all Mrs Cake could come up with in reply.

"Oh don't you see?" Pinkie said as she pushed her face up against her victim's, breathing heavily, "You seemed so desperate to understand me. You kept going on about how you're so sorry for what happened, and how it's such a great loss, and how you know how I feel. But you know what? You really don't know how I feel. So I figured I could give you a little demonstration!"

Pinkie took a step back and wiped the sweat from her face, attempting to compose herself. Humming a happy tune excitedly, she moved to the tray and retrieved a butchers' knife, holding it clumsily between her hooves. She brushed the knife gently against her victim's face, wishing to savour every fleeting moment.

"Those dogs - their claws are sharp, you know?" Pinkie said, swinging the blade with all her strength across Mrs Cake's face. She screamed and tensed up in pain and fear. Blood began pouring down her face as she blubbered in terror.

"Oh, don't be such a baby" Pinkie said, rolling her eyes, "That was a love tap. Come on, what happened to that sympathetic ear you offered me before?"

Giggling hysterically at her own pun, Pinkie began awkwardly sawing at the left ear. She relished in the victim's pleas and screams of agony. She laboured away for a good five minutes before becoming frustrated with her lack of progress. The warm blood which had seemed so delightful a few minutes earlier was now more of annoyance, causing her hooves to slip and making the task increasingly difficult. Wiping the sweat off her brow with her bloody hoof, she examined the wound and realised that she had hardly cut half way through the ear.

"Wow, this is harder than I thought!" Pinkie remarked, disregarding the gut-wrenching wailing as she rummaged in her tray for something that could improve her efficiency. Examining a roll of duct tape, she concluded aloud "That could work," and proceeded to tightly bind the knife to her left hoof. Returning to the laborious slashing, she was rather pleased with how effective her new method was. Finally, Pinkie managed to amputate the ear entirely.

"Thought of that all by myself. Aren't I a clever pony? Or should I say a CLEAVER pony?"The insane pony chuckled and smiled mindlessly.

"Please," said Mrs Cake between sobs, "you don't have to do this."

"Have to? Have to?" Pinkie scoffed before continuing in an offended tone, "You don't get it, do you? I don't have to do anything. I don't have to keep my thoughts all bottled up or dull them with drugs. I don't have to run away from my problems or try to hide them. Most importantly, I don't have to deal with any pony acting like they know how I feel. I'm free now. I can do what I want. I'm in control. You have to do what I say now, so just shut up let me hear you scream like a good girl."

The landlord realised her number was up. She sighed in resignation. There was nothing she could do. Summoning all her energy and courage, she attempted to overcome every instinct of survival. Mrs Cake made an attempt to fly in the face of thousands of years of evolution reinforcing the importance of self preservation. She looked up at the pink mare - the playful girl she had taken in and given a job and a life where no pony else would. "You're sick. You need help," she spat. Pinkie's manic smile was suddenly replaced by a twisted, disgusting look of pure hate.

"You idiot! You stupid little foal!" Pinkie went berserk and lashed out wildly, hacking clumsily at her victim's flesh. "I don't need any pony to help me. I'm powerful and strong! Look at me! Look at what I'm doing to you!"

Pinkie kept striking wildly, taken up in a combination of anger at her victim's insolence and the uncontrollable desire to assert her dominance over another pony. Each blow increased her want for power, yet each blow seemed less satisfying than the last. She felt totally senseless; as if some great force was compelling her to keep striking. After a time, she began to ease back. Her adrenalin had run its course and she was exhausted. Leaning on the tray, she was disappointed to see that Mrs Cake's life had slipped away sometime during her assault. Her corpse was brutally mangled and hardly recognisable. She was covered in blood, but she seemed to have stopped bleeding. What remained of her face seemed to be contorted in a grotesque, unnatural wince. Her mouth was wide opened and saliva was running down her chin.

"You just couldn't do what I told you to do. Well look what you made me do. Look at you now," Pinkie said spitefully. Wiping the sweat and blood from her face she eventually continued "This wasn't what I'd planned at all. You ruined everything." Pinkie felt a terrible emptiness inside her, and became absorbed in depression. Her train of thought was derailed by a whimper nearby. Mr Cake had finally awoken, and was gazing confusedly at the mangled body of his wife as he blubbered pathetically. Pinkie quickly cheered up. Just as well she had a backup ready to go.


	12. Chapter 11: Wonderland

Rainbow Dash slowly emerged from her blissful daze and began to sink into a dark depression. A feeling of pathetic helplessness overwhelmed her, and she felt like waves of sorrow were washing over her. She noticed that she was lying in Twilight's guest bed. Her wings were sprawled and she began to panic when she realised that she didn't know where her pills were. At her initial attempt to get out of bed, her entire body felt numb and useless. Panicking, she continued her effort and eventually got feeling back into her limbs. Struggling out of bed, the pegasus managed to get to her feet. After this moment of relief, she resumed panicking about the whereabouts of her pills. She glanced about the room and began pacing frantically.

"I know what you're looking for," Twilight said down to Rainbow as she descended the stairs.

The pegasus opened her mouth in surprise and gaped stupidly as the smug unicorn brought forward several bottles of pills, but held them out of reach, with her magic. She also summoned a flask of water and held it out for the pegasus. Realising how thirsty she was, Rainbow Dash gladly took it.

"Thank Celestia you're finally awake. Anyway," the unicorn cleared her throat and began an obviously rehearsed speech, "Now, I know you think this is the solution to all your problems, but it'll end up doing you more harm than good. It's addictive, Rainbow Dash. It'll ruin your life. I want to help you through this difficult time." The condescension in her voice was thickening as she proceeded, "We've all been through a lot, but you can't just numb yourself like this. Do you have any idea how harmful these things can be if you abuse them? You were out for three days! I had to drag you off to the doctor. We thought we might need to pump your stomach, for Celestia's sake!"

Twilight realised that the addict was still drinking from the flask and gasped in fear. "Hey, don't drink that too quickly!" she said, yanking it away with her magic.

"Three days?" Rainbow was momentarily taken aback, but quickly shook off her concern and said "You eggheads really think you know what's best for every pony, don't you? I can take care of myself, Twi. I'm a fully grown mare."

Twilight resisted the urge to point out that the junkie clearly couldn't take care of herself, knowing it would only drive her further away.

"We're stronger as one, Rainbow Dash. Together, we can overcome anything."

"Those days are over, Twi. Fluttershy's dead, I killed an entire community of dogs, Pinkie's gone through some serious stuff I'd rather not think about, and you-" Rainbow hesitated and, avoiding eye contact with her friend, decided against finishing her statement.

"I what?"

The former athlete paused before looking Twilight directly in the eye and saying, "you led us through the whole damn thing. I know that you must've gone through hell in that tunnel, but I killed- I don't even know how many dogs. At your order. Do you have any idea what it feels like, having something like that haunting you?"

"Well, like you said," Twilight replied coldly, "you can't blame yourself. It was entirely my fault."

"I didn't mean it like that."

"You have every right to blame me. I blame me. It was my fault. Please, let me help you through this. I owe it to you. I can't live knowing that you're throwing your life away because of something I've done."

"You're not responsible for any other pony's decisions. I'm unhappy, Twi. These pills replace all my bad thoughts with good ones. Hay, I'd rather be dead than live with that terrible feeling I get when I'm sober. Talking about our unhappy thoughts, which is ally you want to do, has just made both of us feel even worse. I can make my own decisions. Just give me the pills."

"What happens when you run out of money? What happens when-"

"Like I said, I can make my own decisions," Rainbow interrupted.

"You're killing yourself, Dash! Let me help-"

"-Just like you helped Pinkie Pie in the tunnels?"

Twilight stared at the pegasus with a completely blank expression. Rainbow dash returned this look. She felt like she went too far, but didn't want to admit it, so she waited for the unicorn to make a move. Without a word, the lavender pony magically hurled the pill bottles at her friend with restrained aggression.

"Before you drift off into another daze, I should probably let you know that Rarity's gone. She's trying to run away from her problems. It looks like you're doing the same," Twilight stated before disappearing in a flash of magic.

Late that afternoon Applejack resolved once again to show her friends the way of the Hand. They clearly just didn't understand her. If she could explain herself clearly they were sure to convert. Rainbow Dash had drifted further from the path than any pony else. Sage taught that addiction weakens the soul and clouds the mind. Drugs create a sensation of happiness which ought to only be known by embracing the Hand. When Applejack arrived at the library she was greeted by a dejected looking Spike.

"Howdy Spike. How're ya doin'?" asked Applejack.

"Fine," Spike hesitated before continuing hastily, "You know, that's the first time any pony has asked me that since... you know. It kinda feels like no pony cares about me."

"Oh. well look, sugar cube, we've all had a lot on our plates this week. No Pony's been thinking about no pony but themselves. C'mon now, let me tell you 'bout the Hand."

Spike rolled his eyes, having been informed of Applejack's newfound evangelicalism by Twilight. He reluctantly opened the door wider to let her in. Rainbow Dash had was leaning against the bookshelf. She was curled up against the wall, shivering. It looked like she was trying to appear as small and insignificant as possible, like a small animal playing dead to avoid a predator. Beholding the pathetic sight, Applejack sneered briefly before offering her unwanted analysis.

"See now, this is what happens when ponies try to fill the void in their lives with the artificial pleasures of the physical world," she said judgementally.

"Why does every pony think they know what's best for me?" Rainbow Dash said angrily.

"Oh, howdy there sugar cube. Thought you were out of it."

"Applejack, before you even go there, don't."

"Beg pardon?"

"Don't go there. Don't try and tell me what's best for me. I can take care of myself."

"Well hay, sugar cube. No pony can really take care of 'erself," preached Applejack, resisting the urge to lose her temper at the pegasus's arrogance, "I wanna tell ya'all 'bout the Hand. See, the Hand is this all-powerful, err, thing that controls everything. Everything that happens is part of the Hand's plan to deliver ponykind to eternal salvation!"

"Wow. Hey Spike, I've been out of it for a while, so fill me in. What's AJ here tripping on and where can I get some?"

"Now see here, Rainbow Dash. What I'm tellin' ya'all is the honest truth. The Hand-"

"So who told YOU about the hand?"

"What?"

"Did some pony trick you into giving them money with this line or did you invent it in your head to feel better about yourself?"

"Well sure there's a small joining fee. But as it happens, the Hand sent one of its agents when I was in my time of need to-"

"When?"

"Well, truth be told I met a missionary near the bottle shop."

Rainbow dash burst into exaggerated laughter, rolling on the ground. "Ok, ok, so let me get this straight. They set up outside a place where desperate and sad ponies flock to," she said, her voice losing its humour and becoming bitter and mean spirited, "then they feed you this line and say they can make your life good, as long as you fork over your bits?"

"If all you're gunna do is mock me, I'll just show myself out then, shall I?"

Applejack shook her head in indignation before storming out. Once she had left, Spike turned to the momentarily sober Rainbow Dash and said "You know, you shouldn't insult her like that. She's just trying to help, you know." Spike's eyes began to well up as he continued "I wish some pony would try to help ME like that."

"Look, kid. A lot of crazy stuff's been happening lately. I don't think any pony is really in the state to help any pony else. I mean, look at Twi and AJ: sure, their intentions seem good, but at the end of the day they're only sticking their noses into other ponies' business to feel better about themselves. The bonehead thinks she can redeem herself, and the mud pony's probably been brainwashed. Besides, what do you want them to do? You can't just talk your way out of sadness."

"No pony's even TRIED to help me though! None of you care about me!"

Rainbow sighed in frustration. She slowly pulled herself to her feet and struggled to move over to the crying dragon. Kneeling down and placing a hoof over his shoulder she smiled weakly at him.

"Ok, Spike," she said, "I'll try to help. What now?"

"Well, it's bad enough seeing all my friends going through this. And what happened to Fluttershy- I mean, she never deserved that, you know? To top it all off, the mare that I love is gone!"

"The mare you love is gone."

The pony's words hung heavily in the air. She was momentarily disengaged from reality, lost in her mind. A tear ran down her cheek as her weak smile faded away. Suddenly, she got to her feet and made for the door.

"Spike, I need to go see some pony. I should be back by tonight. If Twilight shows up, tell her I'm sorry. Okay?"

Without waiting for a response, she left the library and moved with conviction to the resting place of her best friend.


	13. Chapter 12: Two Pegasuses with One Stone

Pinkie sat at the counter of Sugar Cube Corner drowning her sorrows in confectionary. Her hair was still flat and deflated, as was her mood. She hunched over the bench and sighed to herself deeply, dissatisfied with the execution of her great plan. The pink pony felt smaller and weaker than ever. She had let herself down. Her troubled mind was desperately searching for a new, better plan. How could she recover from her failure? Just as she was about to give up, there was a flash of magic before her eyes and Twilight Sparkle appeared, as if in answer to her question.

"Hi, Pinkie. Sorry for the intrusion, I just had to get away from Rainbow Dash for a little while," the unicorn said.

"Oh, no problem, Twi."

"Where are Mr and Mrs Cake?"

"They're on an extended vacation. They left me in charge."

"Is something wrong?"

"Nope. What makes you say that?"

"Pinkie, your hair is flat again."

The pink pony sighed heavily, feeling very sorry for herself. "Well, remember how I said that I had a plan to be my own pony and all that? It didn't work. Now I feel worse than ever!"

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that Pinkie. What was your plan, if you don't mind me asking?"

"I do mind you asking. Trust me, you don't want to know."

"Come on, Pinkie, talk to-"

"This again?" Pinkie's sorrow turned into anger as she interrupted, glaring at the lavender pony.

"Look, I'm just saying we shouldn't keep drifting apart like this. I think we all need to get together and-"

Pinkie interrupted by inhaling deeply as her hair suddenly sprung back into its normal state. "We SHOULD all get together! All six of us. Twilight, you need to leave now. I have some plans to put together."

"What? What do you mean?"

"Oh, I think you'll find out soon enough."

Pinkie giggled hysterically until Twilight slowly backed out of the building.

Rainbow Dash wept softly as she sat next to Fluttershy's grave. She was trying to come up with fitting words to say to her deceased lover. The yellow pegasus never got a proper farewell, and the addict thought it was about time someone paid their respects. The words couldn't arrange themselves in her mind, though. Every time she was about to say something, she would stop. There were simply no words the pony could think of to express the sorrow and guilt which she had been drowning in.

The pegasus sat at the grave for quite some time, and remained there well after Luna raised the moon. She gasped between sobs, knowing that she had to leave her friend again. She felt like she needed to say something before leaving, but nothing meaningful came to mind. Eventually Rainbow resolved to simply vocalise her thoughts.

"Hey Fluttershy," she blubbered, "I said I'd always stick up for you, didn't I? Well, I guess I was wrong. I'm sorry I couldn't protect you, Fluttershy. We've all been wallowing in self pity for, oh, about a week now I think. No pony's really been thinking about anyone but themselves. Meanwhile, you've lost more than the rest of us, haven't you? I can't believe I haven't come up here to say goodbye yet. Sure, we gave you a little ceremony, but you deserve more than that, right?"

She gazed around, trying to think of more to say. Spotting some flowers growing nearby, she picked them and placed them on her friend's grave. "Next time, I'll get you some real nice ones from the market. You know, the brilliant ones Roseluck grows." The pegasus sighed heavily, regaining her composure. "It's always been about you, ya know? I stood up for you in flight school, I followed you down from Cloudsdale, I spent as much time as I could down here. I even went butterfly watching with you that one time. You were my whole life, you know? I'm lost without you. I mocked AJ's religion just before, but I hope there's a heaven and hell. Even if the requirements for entry are as homophobic as they said it was in Cloudsdale, noone would have the heart to send a pony as sweet as you to hell. Me? Well, that's a different story." Rainbow smiled weakly at her quip.

With a heavy sigh, the cyan pony stood up and said her last farewell. "You said that I'd find you again, Fluttershy. I don't know exactly what you meant by that, but I hope you're right."

"Wow, Dashie. That's really sweet!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed before hitting the pegasus over the back of her head with a shovel.


	14. Chapter 13: The Spy

The lavender pony slowly made her way to the library, concerned and confused about Pinkie's strange behaviour. The more she pondered it, the stronger her unease grew. Eventually she decided to double back and see if any pony else had noticed something funny. "Just to quell my paranoia" she figured.

The unicorn knocked on the door of one of the houses across the street from Sugar Cube Corner. She was greeted by a brown earth pony she hadn't met, so she introduced herself.

"Hello. My name is Twilight Sparkle. I'm sorry to bother you, but I was just wondering if Mr and Mrs Cake mentioned anything about going on vacation to you?"

"Um, nope. They're not really the type to do something spontaneous like that, either."

Twilight visited a dozen or so neighbours and got a similar answer from each of them. Sweat started prickling on her brow. It was becoming increasingly difficult to shrug off her concerns. She decided that if she vocalised her concerns she might suddenly realise how ridiculous they were. With this in mind she headed back to her library home.

Walking through the door, Twilight immediately called out to Rainbow Dash and Spike.

"Rainbow Dash isn't here," said Spike, "She told me to tell you she's sorry. Didn't say what she's sorry for, but it seemed pretty sincere. Anyway, she went out again. Said she needs to see someone."

"That's odd, she's been avoiding talking to any of us. It didn't look like she was in much of a state to do anything either, and she had plenty of meds when I left so she's not out doctor shopping. Did she say where she was going?"

"Not that I can remember."

"So she just left?"

"Yes. Well, she was going to talk to me about this whole thing, but when I mentioned that I lost the mare I love she just repeated me, and then left. I was really hoping she would-"

"Lost the mare she loves..."

Waves of understanding flowed over Twilight as she interrupted. The wave quickly mounted into a tsunami of realisation that crashed down on the unicorn as her mind drew the full picture.

"...and she wants all six of us to get together. Spike, I need to head out. It's probably nothing, but get ready to send a letter. I might need to contact Celestia when I get back. If I'm not back by morning, send a note to Celestia yourself. I'm sure she'll figure out that something's wrong."

Without waiting for her dragon to respond, Twilight ran out the door.

"Like I was saying, no pony cares about me," Spike muttered to himself once he was on his own again.

Twilight returned less than half an hour later. Her mane was frazzled and she was breathing heavily. The bright purple eyes seemed glazed over and unable to focus on one object for more than a second.

"Spike!" she demanded as soon as she entered, "Send this note to Celestia, this note to Shining Armour, and this one to Applejack. DO NOT read them yourself. This is an absolute, life or death emergency!"

Without offering an explanation, the pony ran off once again. Naturally, the first thing the dragon did once the lavender pony bolted off was disobey her. He opened one of the scrolls and read it. His eyes widened in shock as his heart sank.

"An absolute life or death emergency," he repeated as he made another copy of the note. After sending the letters to Celestia's palace, Sweet Apple Acres and The Starving Artist, he glanced at the newspaper resting on the table. The headline read "Equestrian High Command to Far North after Embarrassing Bureaucratic Blunder". Uttering the strongest swear in his vocabulary, the baby dragon rushed to the door to warn Twilight. She was long gone. He wanted to help, but what could he do? There's no way he could catch up with the unicorn to deliver this information, and a baby dragon isn't much help in a fight. Hopefully the few magic mail workers Celestia left in Canterlot would forward the vital letter quickly. Otherwise, it could take up to a day for Celestia to come down and confront Pinkie Pie.


	15. Chapter 14: Five to One

When Rainbow Dash finally regained consciousness, she became aware of a putrid smell and attempted to cover her nose with her hoof. She was briefly puzzled as to why she couldn't do this, and quickly realised that all four of her hooves had been strongly tied together with duct tape. Her eyes flew open instantly and she saw a grinning pink pony standing over her.

"Pinkie Pie? What's happening?" the pegasus asked in a strained voice.

"This is our intervention, Dashie! After sulking at home for a while, I realised that Twilight is right. We do need to work our problems out together. So, here you are! Sorry about the whole violently assaulting and binding you thing, by the way. It was really the only way to make sure you'd cooperate. Anyway, the rest should be arriving pretty soon. Then I can show you the big surprise," here Pinkie waved a hoof at what appeared to be a bundle of blankets, "and we can get this party started!"

"I don't need any help."

"Not quite grasping the situation, are ya Dashie?" Pinkie snorted incredulously, "You don't really have a choice. Here, maybe this will give you a bit of an idea."

The pink pony walked to the other side of the room. As Rainbow's eyes followed her, she realised that the room was very dark, small and bare. It had only one door and no windows. The walls appeared to be of red brick and the floor of concrete, but it was difficult to tell in the dark. The only items in the room were the bundle a few feet away from Rainbow, the shovel leaning against the wall next to the door, a small ceiling lamp emitting insufficient light and the wheeled tray with a cloth over it that Pinkie was retrieving.

"Where the hay am I?" demanded the bound pony.

"Oh, that hardly matters," replied Pinkie as she wheeled the tray to her friend, "Here, take a look at some of these!"

With great showmanship she pulled aside the cloth to reveal an assortment of instruments. Each of them appeared very sinister and dangerous, and they were all immaculately kept and neatly laid out. The pink pony grinned wickedly at the pegasus, waiting for her reaction.

"What the hay, Pinkie?"

"I guess you could say this is more of a practical, forceful intervention. Well more of a sadistic mass murder, really."

"Alright, you've got my attention," Rainbow chuckled, "now cut the crap and tell me what you want."

"You don't think I'm being serious, do you?"

"Pinkie, you've never been serious."

The earth pony sighed and rolled her eyes. No pony ever took her seriously. Before she could begin explaining the situation to her dear friend she was cut off by the sound of a bell. Well, Rainbow would understand everything soon enough. She quickly gagged the pegasus with a rag before picking up the shovel and waiting by the door. 

Before Twilight's mind could even process seeing Rainbow Dash gagged and bound in the basement of Sugar Cube Corner, she felt a heavy blow against her head and fell unconscious. The pink pony smiled about how easily she had executed her plan.

"Isn't it nice the way she keeps coming to the rescue like this?" Pinkie said to herself before bringing down the shovel with all her might again. The blow struck with pinpoint accuracy and a loud crack rang out as the unicorn's horn was snapped clean off. With a satisfied grin, the sadist repeated the action on both of Twilight's hind legs, ensuring she would not escape.

"Don't you just love that sound, Dashie? That super wonderful yea-I'm-strong-enough-to-render-you-totally-immobile crack?" she said turning to face the pegasus, "Looks like we've got a bit of time to kill before Applejack shows up, and even then we'll have to wait for them both to come to. Let me run you through the plan."

Hurrying excitedly back to the pegasus's side, the earth pony waved a hoof over her assorted tools. She licked her lips before saying "Ok, so some ponies have been trying to convince me that they know what I went through in those tunnels. I decided to show them that, no, they really didn't understand, by giving them a bit of an insight into what it was like. Sadly I got a bit, well, overexcited and it didn't quite go as planned. It was actually Twilight who gave me the idea of collecting all my bestest buddies in the whole town together like this. She said if we share the burden, we can get through this together, right? I figure if you lot can picture exactly what I went through, we can carry the burden together even betterer! It's a pity none of us will live long enough to really be much use to each other. Now, I'm a generous pony. I'm going to give you a chance to get out of this. You're free to leave at any time. All you need to do is fly away. Didn't you wonder why your wings aren't bound?" Finishing the rant, the earth pony pouted dramatically as if disappointed by the idea of her friend leaving.

As the pegasus flapped her wings, the pout gradually transformed into an evil grin. Each wing beat was weaker than the last, and each wasted more energy. Rainbow Dash managed to lift herself about a foot or two above ground before her wings buckled and she crashed back to earth. She rolled onto her back as she writhed in pain.

"You want to stay? Oh, Dashie, you're too sweet!" Pinkie jeered.

"Mrmph," replied the victim through her gag.

Pinkie removed the gag from her victim's mouth to allow her to talk freely.

"Why are you doing this?"

"Um... duh, I just told you! We go through everything together. I'm going to give you a taste of what the dogs put me through!" she said before picking up a round, long metal pole from the tray and continuing, "Hey, guess where this goes? Honestly, I'm kinda worried about this one; a filly fooler like yourself might actually enjoy it."

Rainbow's eyes widened in shock and fear. The reality of the situation was finally sinking in, and the failed escape attempt greatly amplified the pegasus's dread. Furthermore, how did the freak know about her sexual preference? Fluttershy was the only pony in Ponyville who knew about it. In her frantic, weakened state, she thought the earth pony must be omnipotent. She was too scared to shrink away and too scared to try to escape. She simply stared into those soulless blue eyes pleadingly, trying to appeal to any fragment of morality left in the ruthless monster.

"Oh don't look at me like that," continued the sadist, "no pony breaks a Pinkie promise. I became Fluttershy's little confidant, yaknow. Oh boy, she could go on and on and on and on and on and ON about you!"

Pinkie circled her friend a few times before stopping and forcing herself on top of the pegasus.

"You know, I'm really curious. Fluttershy said it tasted like skittles." Before she had a chance to proceed, the bell rang again. "No rest for the wicked," Pinkie remarked as she gagged Rainbow Dash and retook her position by the door. 

"Hold on you two, I'm-"

The earth pony was interrupted as a hard blow came down on her head.

"You're what, Applejack?" Pinkie smirked as she broke Applejack's hind legs and dragged her next to Twilight. "Making this too easy? I agree. Ok, Dashie, let's get this gag off of you again." She put her words to action.

"Anyway, where were we... oh right, filly fooling. Boy, it must've been a hard life, huh? Trying to hide the fact that you're a raging dyke from every pony in Cloudsdale can't be fun. Then you come down here and a few years later BAM," Pinkie clopped her hooves together, "the love of your life gets cut open by a diamond dog because you were too slow to save her. That's what this is all about, isn't it?"

Pinkie was about to retrieve an instrument from her tray when a blinding flash of light caught her attention. Spinning around, she saw Rarity sprawled on the floor. The pink pony grabbed her shovel and bounded to her side. Just as she was about to bring a blow down on the unicorn, she saw that she was dazed, confused and exhausted from performing a complicated long range teleportation spell that even Twilight could barely pull off. Nevertheless, she brought the shovel down heavily on the horn and hind legs; partly for safety, but mostly for pleasure.

The pain snapped the white unicorn straight out of her daze. She shrieked in pain and terror as she felt her bones give way under the blunt force of the shovel. Looking up at the psychopath, she scowled defiantly and attempted to rise before crumbling into a teary mess.

"Hang in there, Rarity! We're going to be ok!" Twilight said with determination.

"Oh, hey Twi. When did you come to? Don't answer that, it's not important. Let's see if my fellow earth pony over here is with us," Pinkie said happily as she bounced over to Applejack. "Hello? Is there any pony in there? Just nod if you can hear me. Is there any pony home?"

The farmer managed to raise her head slightly and murmur before collapsing again.

"You know what? I don't have time to wait around for her. Let's get this party started!" Pinkie looked at each pony for a moment before continuing, "You don't seem too keen. Well, I guess I should say why I've summoned you all here-"

"You didn't summon us here," interrupted Twilight, "I figured out what you were up to by myself and came here to stop you!"

"Oh, you figured it out all by yourself, did you? Was it somewhere between the maniacal laughing and unexplained disappearance of the Cakes? Geez Twilight, I'm not stupid! I figured you'd put two and two and two together and come marching in here yourself, and that you'd probably let the other elements know. Honestly, I wasn't expecting Rarity here, but the more the merrier. I'm bringing us all together, just like you wanted!" Pinkie clapped her hooves together.

"You won't get away with this. Celestia will be here in minutes. Stop now while you still have a chance."

"I thought you were more politically aware, Twi. Celestia isn't even in Equestria right now. We've got plenty of time before we have to worry about our beloved princess. You were counting on her, weren't you? A dues ex machina to come down and save you at the last minute?" Pinkie scoffed, "See, here's your problem, Twi. You keep on rushing in to be the hero without thinking it through. So much for being an intellectual. In the forest, you screwed up. Breaking us all up like that was a bad call, and I paid the price for it. That's no reason to go full blown emo on us. I'm the one who got fucked up, literally and figuratively. I should be the one wallowing in self pity. To your credit, you tried to help, but it wasn't motivated by wanting to help your friend. I can see right through that, Twi. You just wanted to make up for your mistake so you could feel better about yourself. That's why you've been so forceful about it. You sent me down the tunnel alone, and you only wanted to help us out of selfishness. This is your fault. Thanks to your desire to act like a hero from a bad book, you've wasted your friends' lives as well as your own."

Pinkie moved towards Rainbow Dash before continuing her lecture, "Now Dashie here has a lot of blood on her hooves. She failed to save Fluttershy, and wanting revenge she killed an entire community of diamond dogs. I really don't care about that. What really grinds my gears is that you couldn't cope with the guilt and decided to throw your life away. If you didn't realise that in the first place, you must have figured it out when you finally came out of that drug fuelled daze. Don't kid yourself. You knew those pills were killing you. You WANTED them to kill you. Hay, you should be thanking me for this. Sure, it'll be way more painful than overdosing, but at least it'll happen sooner, right?"

The other ponies maintained a shocked silence. The sadist was delighted that she had a captive audience and she approached Rarity before continuing, "Now you're the root reason for all this, aren't you? Twilight screwed up, but all you had to do was send word back to us or something, and everything would be just peachy. But like I said, I'm not judging any of you for what happened back then. Now running away from your friends when they need you the most, on the other hoof, is inexcusable. I'll kill you for leaving us, Rarity."

Observing that the orange earth pony was slowly becoming more aware of her surroundings, Pinkie bounced to her side as she prepared to wrap up her speech, "Now Applejack, you probably consider yourself to be pretty righteous, yea? Thing is, the way you chose to deal with all this stuff is just plain stupid. You've convinced yourself that no pony is to blame for anything, and that in death the virtuous will get a wonderful reward. It's delusional, and if it weren't for me you'd devote your whole life to your imaginary friend. This would be as much of a waste as Twi's quest for redemption or Dashie's addiction. To snap you out of that little dream of yours, I'll show you what really happens to a pony once they've died."

Pinkie Pie slowly walked towards the large bundle sitting near Rainbow Dash. Each step seemed powerful and she moved with a sense of purpose. A thin smile grew on her face as she drew nearer.

"Rainbow, look away!" yelled Twilight.

"Rainbow, keep watching!" replied Pinkie as she continued towards her goal. When she stopped by the bundle, she turned back and grinned at her friends. "You're going to LOVE this," she said immediately before pulling off the blanket and revealing the decaying corpse of a yellow pegasus mare.


	16. Chapter 15: Of Our Elaborate Plans

The smell, which had been somewhat suppressed by the blanket, hit the ponies before the shock did. A putrid wave of unclean air flew across the room the moment Fluttershy's body was uncovered. Beforehand it had merely been a tolerable odour. Now it seemed to bathe the room in a thick, sickly air. Every pony except the sadist suddenly felt claustrophobia as much as disgust. Seeing the body made Pinkie's threat seem much more real and terrifying.

"Isn't it great that we can get together like this? All six of us?" the pink pony squealed, her friends' horror elating her mood.

"You're insane!" remarked Rarity.

"Well, duh. I've always been insane," she replied with a smile, "Now I've got the guts to embrace who I am, you know? I've really come into my own over the past week. It's like I understand myself now. I'm not scared anymore. I'm in control of my own life, and finally do what I want."

"Well, Pinkie, you seem to understand the four of us pretty well," said Twilight in the calmest voice she could manage under the circumstances, "But you've clearly got yourself all wrong."

"How d'yah figure, Twi?" asked the sadist as she rummaged through the tray. She brought out the butchers' knife and held it aloft to the ponies' dismay. Grinning as they recoiled and horror, she placed it on her hoof. Clumsily she bound the sinister weapon to her limb while her friends stared on, helpless. The lavender pony was only momentarily taken aback and she quickly recovered, ready to tell the pink pony exactly how she figured.

"I'd hardly say," Twilight grunted in pain as she tried to adjust her position, but managed to talk in a calm yet firm tone, as if she was telling off a child, "I'd hardly say this is the action of a pony in control of her life. On the contrary, I think you feel almost compelled to do this."

"Oh, you think that, do you?" the sadist chuckled, walking to the clever pony's side on her three unused legs, "Well, every pony is entitled to their opinion. I mean, I'm going to kill you first for mouthing off at me like that, but you're still entitled to your opinion."

Pinkie caressed the lavender pony with the blade. She sighed heavily as a smile grew on her face. This was going to be such fun! The two ponies locked eyes. Twilight's face was stone hard and unemotional despite the pure fear which was consuming her. The sadist was momentarily ticked off by this. She was supposed to be pleading in submission. What was wrong with this pony, and why was she being disobedient? Pinkie quickly brushed off her annoyance and decided that it merely gave her a blank canvas to work with.

She gently pushed the blade into her victim's skin, just beneath hear left ear. Sinking it deeper, she smiled with anticipation. Once the killer was satisfied with the crimson stream strickling down the metal, she gave a warm grin. The unicorn winced in pain, but refused to break eye contact and kept her reaction minimal. Ever so slowly, the pink pony brought the blade down, cutting deeply into the purple skin. Her weapon left a bright, shining red trail. She took the blade to the edge of the lip and finally drew it out. Blood flowed freely down the steadfast pony's face, but she made herself ignore it. Breathing heavily, she managed to hold back most of the tears that were flowing down her face and mixing with the blood. She never broke eye contact, and constantly maintained a stone cold expression.

"Tough little cookie, aren't yah Twi. I'll peel your face off if that's what I need to do to get the reaction I want," Pinkie said, repeating the same action on the other side of the face, "There, now it's nice and symmetrical. We're just getting started, by the way. Next up, I'm shoving a metal pole in you."

"Those dogs completely violated you," Twilight hissed, forcing a smile, "They robbed you of every ounce of self respect and dignity. They made you feel absolutely helpless, didn't they?"

"Yea, keep talking!" Pinkie swung her blade heavily across the unicorn's face, "Make me angry and feel my wrath! I wanna show you what I'm capable of!"

"You really just feel weak and powerless, don't you? Why else would you need to do something like this to convince yourself you have some sort of control? It's fairly understandable. You had all your power taken from you. You were humiliated and disempowered. Now you think that putting other ponies through it will return that power. Of course-"

"Aww," the sadist cut one of Twilight's ears off in one clean blow as she interrupted, "You couldn't be more wrong, Twi!" she was raising her voice and becoming increasingly angry, "I'm doing this because I can. Look, you're in no position to be talking to me like that. One more peep and I'll make this even more painful than I was going to."

"Of course," the unicorn struggled to continue as she was kept conscious only by the adrenalin surging through her veins, "you'll never manage to reclaim the confidence you had before those dogs had their way with you. Any idiot could grasp that. Honestly, I'm not surprised that it flew-"

"ENOUGH!" Pinkie roared furiously. Once again, she was overcome with blinding rage and thrashed wildly at the arrogant, pitiful excuse for a pony before her. "Oh, Twilight, you're SOOOO smart. Make me angry! Great idea. Well, I'm not going to let you ruin my night. I planned it VERY well, and it's going to be a lovely evening. If you won't join us and cooperate, then you can just die RIGHT FUCKING NOW."

Pinkie struck her around the face and neck from the left and the right. Twilight initially attempted to keep her posture and demeanour dignified, but the pain was too much. She tried to drag herself away, but was unable to escape Pinkie's psychopathic rage. Still unsatisfied with the shallow gashes, the sadist screamed and raised her hoof into the air. The unicorn shrank in submission as she was overcome with fear. The murderous pony brought down the blade with all of her might. The blow missed her victim's head, coming down on the shoulder and breaking right though the collar bone. Her foreleg was hanging by a thread, but she was still alive. She writhed around in pain as the sadist resumed her attack. With all her strength, she struck her friend over and over. Working the body now, the blood was freely flowing. Slicing mindlessly away, no part of the unicorn's body escaped her rage. The savage attack was exhausting. Finally satisfied that her victim's whole body had been totally bloodied, broken and bruised, Pinkie's adrenalin waned and the attack stopped

To the amazement of every pony, Twilight was still alive. The wounds covered her body, and she was barely recognisable. Her entire body was covered in glistening, bright red blood. She was unable to talk, let alone make a defiant remark, but with a great struggle she looked up at her attacker. Remarkably, both her eyes were completely intact; two surviving islands of beauty and hope where the rest of her body had been wrecked. They shone like bright beacons as she looked into the sadist's eyes. Pinkie Pie returned the gaze with her own dull wells into the abyss. In that moment they understood each other more than they ever could before. The pink pony had clearly seen things no pony ever should. Even after making her friend suffer what would surely be a fatal attack, the murderer saw a glimmer of sympathy in the deep, bright purple.

The room became totally silent as the two continued to exchange gazes. Every pony was waiting for someone else to make a move. Inspired by her friend's resilience, Rainbow decided to pipe up and defy the beast with the best weapon she had at the time: sarcasm.

"Yea, you're clearly in complete control, aren't you Pinkie?"

"Yes, darling, that was a truly impressive display of your power," Rarity mocked.

"Yah not just crazy, yah weak minded," added Applejack, who had fully regained consciousness.

All three ponies cringed, awaiting the sadist's furious assault. They were kept waiting. The pink pony stood on three legs, holding her weapon aloft and gazing from it to the bloodied pulp of her dying friend. Her mouth twitched, and all of a sudden her hair deflated and became straight. Her blank stare had transformed into a confused frown and her eyes began to well up, on the verge of tears. She slowly pulled the tape off her hoof with her mouth, ignoring the blood that she was smearing on her face. The blade fell to the ground with a loud metallic clang that seemed to echo through the room. She gazed around at each pony individually, before allowing her gaze to come to rest on Twilight.

Pinkie started crying as she said in a weak yet clearly audible voice, "You're right".

The weeping pony approached Rainbow Dash, who scowled up at her silently. She guiltily tried to avoid eye contact as she undid the bounds. It was a difficult task as the blood and sweat made her slip. She had been very excessive with the tape when she bound the pony, and it took some time to complete the task.

"Sorry, Rainbow," Pinkie apologised for taking so long, "There's blood on my hooves-"

Her weak apology was cut off when the cyan pony made a desperate effort to attack her. The newly reformed sadist put up no resistance, accepting in her mind that she deserved whatever came to her. The pegasus was ready to kill the sick pony. She was relentlessly beating her, trying desperately to crush her opponent's skull in. Froth was forming from her mouth as she screamed in fury. Before she even knocked Pinkie unconscious, she was interrupted by an impossibly shrill scream. Looking up, she saw that it had come from Rarity.

"Rainbow! Doesn't this remind you of something?" the white unicorn croaked painfully.

The pegasus looked down at the pony who had caused her so much distress. The pony who had fatally wounded one of her friends. The pony who, moments ago, intended to kill her. The pony who lay helplessly before her now. She had the power to kill this pony; to completely obliterate her. It would be so easy, and maybe even give her closure for what she did to Twilight. It felt familiar alright.

"I'm not doing this again," Rainbow said spitefully as she pulled herself off the earth pony, "I don't need that on my conscious. You're not worth it, Pinkie. I'll let Celestia deal with you."

The pegasus walked on stiff aching legs to Fluttershy's corpse. After looking at the remains of her lover for a moment, she said a simple goodbye before pulling the blanket over her face. She then walked over to Twilight's side.

"I'm not burying another friend. You're pretty messed up, Twi, but Celestia is coming. She'll do some crazy alicorn healing magic and you'll be good as new, ok?"

With much effort, Twilight managed to slowly shake her head and smile weakly. She tried to say something, but the only noise she managed to produce was a low, painful moan. Rainbow attempted to put pressure on the worst of the wounds. It was hopeless. There were too many to cover, and even under pressure the blood flowed freely. The pegasus soon gave up on extending her friend's painful life and wrapped her forearms around the unicorn's head, pulling her into an embrace.

"We won't waste this, Twi," Rainbow croaked between sobs, "I won't throw my life away anymore. I'll just try and talk it out, like you said. I'll live a life you'd be proud of."

"Yes, darling, seeing what you went through for us – I'll never let these two out of my sight again!" added Rarity.

"You've done us a good turn, Twi," said Applejack, "Hey, you saved us after all, right? We won't forget this."

Twilight, through a great effort, looked around at all her friends. She nodded and managed to smile. Her friends were going to be ok. Thanks to her. With a sigh, the unicorn allowed herself to relax. Feeling the waves of affection and appreciation from her friends, she felt oddly comfortable. She wanted to stay in that moment forever, but she was very tired. It was finally time for the peaceful sleep she had been unable to obtain over the past week. Gazing up thankfully at the cyan pegasus, she exhaled deeply before allowing herself to slip into unconsciousness for the last time.


	17. Epilogue

Dear Princess Celestia,

It's been just a month after your emissary found us in such a sorry state in the basement of Sugar Cube Corner, but I think Twilight would be proud of the progress we've all made. I'm not letting Applejack and Rainbow Dash out of sight again, that's for sure. We've started communicating properly again, just like before the horrid incident. That's probably all we ever needed to do, really.

Rainbow's rehabilitation has been going splendidly. She's been sober since the Sugar Cube Corner incident. It's amazing how addicted a pony can get after just one week of reliance on those wretched pills! Fortunately, she's getting over her withdrawal. Her wings are still very weak and her coordination leaves much to be desired, but the doctors say that if she keeps doing her exercises, stays sober and otherwise lives a healthy life she should be able to fly again within a few months. Being earthbound is taking its toll on the poor pegasus, but she knows we're doing all we can to get her in the skies again. She knows we're all doing our best, but she's acting quite stubborn and narcissistic. It's good to have the old Rainbow Dash back.

Applejack hasn't gone so far as to renounce her religion, which is understandable. I have managed to convince her to cut back her church contributions and to keep her dogma away from Apple Bloom. She can make her own decisions in this matter when she's old enough. Nor is she forcing this weird heresy on Rainbow and I as much as she did at first, thankfully.

I realise that, in your great wisdom and mercy, you know how best to handle Pinkie Pie. She's a danger to society and frankly insane, and one must question if she can ever be truly rehabilitated. Still, she was our friend for a long time, and Applejack, Rainbow Dash and I would all like to know what you're doing with her. Any information would be appreciated, but I understand if you choose to withhold it from us.

Twilight made the ultimate sacrifice for us. I still blame myself for what happened in the tunnels, but I'm no longer trying to simply outrun my guilt. I'm staying here with my friends. I've glued myself to their sides in our time of need. None of us will ever really be the same as before, but together we can overcome anything. Hoof in hoof, we'll find our place in the world.

Your loyal subject, Rarity

PS: Spike's doing ok too.


	18. Afterword

Thanks for reading my first fanfic! I thoroughly enjoyed (and was sometimes thoroughly frustrated) writing this, and intend to write more fanfic in the future. This fic turned out more or less the way I intended. Apart from the massive amount of time it took to write, the process went fairly smoothly. Overall I'm happy with the result. I know it's not great, but it's no worse than I had anticipated. As I get more experience and whatnot I hope to write something that's genuinely good, and not just by the incredibly low standards this community has.

This is where you can help me: I need feedback. Constructive criticism is probably the best thing for me right now. As much as I like being told that you enjoy the fic (or that Pinkie reminds you of Hannibal Lector), it's the flaws that really need to be focused on. Naturally, if you want to shower me with praise, I'm all for it. Praise is nice.

I'll list some of the flaws I realise I need to work on, but even if you have a criticism on this list, tell me! You might offer a new outlook on it or something.

I "tell" too much rather than "show"

There's probably too many big chunks of dialogue

The ending was too sudden. I tried fleshing it out more, but I couldn't find a balance between waffling on and saying "bam, done". In the end I settled for this.

The story should have gone for way more than one week, but once I'd set the pace it was kind of hard to slow down

Continuity errors

Plot holes that I had to patch up with plot conveniences

I need to throw in more short sentences; using lots of semi colons and commas is nice for some long, flowing sentences, but short sentences need to be in the mix too. I think they're good for impact.

Many more things that I can't think of right now.

Again, thanks for reading. Don't forget to comment, review, favourite, and rate. I'm going to write more fanfic, so if you enjoyed this one you should probably add me to your watch list too.

-aDerangedBrony


End file.
